Tag Archives: strain advice

Virgo Stoner Horoscope June

Virgo
Virgo
Virgo Stoner Horoscope June
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Stoner Virgo, have you ever heard the phrase, ‘It was written in the stars’?  Well, I think they meant planets, and boy do you have a book to read this month!

One of your largest character traits and strengths will put you at the mercy of planetary alignment in June.  You have a great ability to be stable while also being flexible.  This key characteristic will be tested in June as you can expect to be pushed and pulled in multiple directions by cosmic influence.

Your cannabis prescription this month is EVERYTHING!  Fill your stash jars with a plethora of cannabis species and strains.  From high CBD to blended hybrids, and even some pure breads for sure.

Believe in yourself stoner Virgo.  Arm yourself with the right cannabis tool for the correct moment.  The shifting landscape of cosmic influence will require an ability to remain stable while bending with flexibility.  But remember my stoner Virgin:  This ability is within you.

There will be moments of extreme confidence wrapped in resolve.  Select a hybrid for these extreme moments to soften the edges of cosmic influence.

There will be moments of danger within communication conflict.  Sense these moments stoner Virgo.  Select a more contemplative Indica strain to help yourself think before speaking.

There will be moments of raw emotion from internalizations.  Find a Sativa dominant hybrid to soften the raw edges of powerful growth and remembrances.

I cannot say if this will be a positive or negative month for the stoner Virgo.  I can say that you have everything you need to make it a month of progress and great growth.  Pay attention to your personal environment, and adjust accordingly.

Pisces Stoner Horoscope June

Pisces
Pisces
Pisces Stoner Horoscope June
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Stoner Pisces, you are the emotional core of the stoner Zodiac. Your ability to empathize remains unmatched, and your willingness to listen, laugh, and light one up with your fellow tokin’ terrestrial astronauts seems endless. 

You should definitely continue the mantra of sharing is caring, just make sure that you are giving yourself the care you need first.  Afterall, it’s great to share a bowl with a friend in need, to puff, puff, and pass on the good vibes, but this doesn’t mean that you have to give away your entire stash and positivity:  Leave some for yourself my friendly Fish.

Don’t worry stoner Pisces if you feel a little like a fish-out-of-water in the early days of the month. This is expected because your usual, chronically calm and cool demeanor is set to get shaken up by the Sun’s invigorating rays. 

At least for the early days of June, you should steer clear of Sativa-dominant strains. The additional solar energy might take a little getting used to. The goal is to harness that extra energy, and channel it into creative endeavors and new adventures; not to end up with your mind racing while you go nowhere fast. 

You should keep your stash jars and smoke sessions filled with Indica-dominant or hybrid strains like Wedding Cake, Blue Dream, or any of the Gorilla Glue family. These feel-good greens will help you harness the power of the Sun, and turn it into forward moving momentum and growth, while still keeping you grounded.

Stoner Pisces, as the month progresses you will get used to operating at a higher energy frequency.  Once the Summer solstice hits on the 21st, all systems and strains are a go!  If any of your current cannabis companions can’t keep up with your newfound fast pace, it’s okay to find a new school of stoners to swim and sesh with for a while.

Leo Stoner Horoscope June

Leo
Leo
Leo Stoner Horoscope June
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Stoner Leo the Summer season is here!  Are you ready to dunk dabs, burn bowls, and smoke spliffs?  Ready or not, the universal influence in June will be all smoke sessions GO!

And right away the celestial influence will favor the organizational skills of the stoner Leo.  Grab the calendar early in the month and plan your terrestrial adventures.  The leader of the pack will be at peak communicative powers around the 3rd of June.  

Gather the ganja gang.  They will be ready to receive your instructions!

But understand this stoner Leo:  Part of leadership is understanding not every stoner is grooving on the universal vibe as you.  Take your cannabis companionship out and about on the terrestrial plane; but don’t be dismayed by the numbers of your pack.  Sometimes the best moments are shared with only a few cannabis companions.

The power of the Sun may seem overwhelming with an impetus for action.  Chill my vibrant Lion.  It’s not always about the size of your pride, or the destination of the smoke circle.  Often, it is about the journey taken together.

So when the urge comes to blanket your cannabis companions with protection, or cajole them with personal desires, take a moment to chill stoner Leo.  Toke time for a quick solo smoke session.  Allow the perspective enhancing vapors of the sacred herb to give you clarity in these emotional moments.  It’s Summer.  There is too much to do to get bogged down in personal pressures.

Aries Stoner Horoscope June

Aries
Aries
Aries Stoner Horoscope June
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The magic of Summer is upon us stoner Aries.  And with the calendar change of season comes the blessing of celestial bodies for the youngest of the stoner Zodiac.

All of your wonderful stoner star sign traits will be the engine that drives positivity this month.

Naivete, enthusiasm, and even a bit of stubbornness will suit you well in the first Summer month.  So pack your stash jar with only your most favorite cannabis strains.  Those herbal delights you find most agreeable will be the best medicine for a blessed period.

One important aspect of June will be the emotional aperture created by planetary alignment.  Don’t read into this too much stoner Aries.  The emotional floodgates may open you to feeling and understanding the nature and wonderment of the world around you.

Toke time to light a spliff, and enjoy the enlightened connection between you and the universe.  Your connected cannabis copilot will only enhance the voyage.

And yes stoner Aries, your enthusiastic energy will bring you bountiful learned experiences in June.  Soak it up!  Meditative smoke sessions will be filled with research and knowledgeable quests instead of deep inner digs.

The only stress or strain may be found in the final decade of the month.  But each stoner Aries will have their individual challenge to face.  Just remember my resilient Ram:  You are an amazing creature capable of anything you set your mind to.

By the end of the month all sacred bowls will be in balance.  Perhaps a shared smoke session with a cannabuddy will solidify the magic created, and push positivity into the next period.

Dragon Shooter Steamroller

Aquarius Stoner Horoscope June

Aquarius
Aquarius
Aquarius Stoner Horoscope June
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Stoner Aquarius most who know you would consider you to be a generally open minded being. But this June, with a little help from the sacred herb, and a few meditative smoke sessions, you will be able to fully awaken your third eye sight.

Whether you are working on an important project at work, or picking up on the vibes of your cannabis companions during your weekly smoke sesh, your enhanced attention to even the smallest details will be a big help to everyone.

Just be careful my burdened Water-Bearer.  Even if you are seeing things clearly from a lifted perspective, you don’t want your confidence and clarity to come across as being condescending.

Sometimes it takes passing the peace pipe around the circle a few times in order to get everyone on the same level. These are the times when the connection of cannabis can help to calm everyone, and be the catalyst needed to open the lines of communication.

Just be aware stoner Aquarius:  There may be a few conversations this season that should be more talking and less toking.  Be on the lookout for a partner-in-chronic whose vibe is feeling a little off.

You might be ready to blaze into the Summer sesh. Ready to pack the pipe, grab your sticky stash, and hit the open road.  Maybe it’s to light up at your favorite smoke spot for old times’ sake.  Or, perhaps you’re feeling adventurous and have no particular destination in mind.

However, there is someone in your inner smoke circle who isn’t quite prepared for the hot and hazy days of Summer ahead.  Rest assured stoner Aquarius, this person will get their groove back, in no small part because of your kind words and listening ear. But, while it’s great to supply a bud loving buddy with good green, just remember sometimes being a good friend is all that a person really needs.

Virgo Stoner Horoscope May

Virgo
Virgo
Virgo Stoner Horoscope May
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Stoner Virgo, the final Spring month may set up as a battle of ideas.  Perhaps a conflict between natural traits and cosmic influence.  Maybe even a debate between planning and action.  The great news is that there is no better stoner star sign to have a contemplative debate with themselves more so than the stoner Virgo.

My sweet Virgin you will feel at home in May.  Inward contemplation assisted by your cannabis copilot will come easy, and provide sparks of inspiration for action.  However, use caution with high minded communications.  These self reflected marijuana musings might not be ready for smoke circle consumption.

If simple conversations take a defensive or heated tone, step out to toke time to reflect.  You are highly capable stoner Virgo, but an endless argument leads to a dead end of frustration every time.

Thus the debate of the month becomes like that stoney Clash classic, Should I Stay or Should I Go.  Your natural trait, and universal influence, will favor a contemplative stoner Virgo with planning smoke sessions in solitude.  But a brisk cosmic breeze of social energy will tempt the Virgin to the flame of smoke circle dynamics.

There will be times to share a joint, and a philosophical exploration.  There will be times to forgo challenging topics with cannabis companions.  And there will be times to jump into the smoke circle, but keep your secrets and plans to yourself.

It’s all up to you stoner Virgo.  Trust yourself.  Trust the sacred herbal influence.  And trust your connection to the universe. 

Aquarius Stoner Horoscope May

Aquarius
Aquarius
Aquarius Stoner Horoscope May
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They say April showers bring May flowers. And you can be certain this month, stoner Aquarius, will be full of all kinds of flowers!  The kind that smell good, the kind you smoke, and the kind that smell good when you smoke them!

While other signs are trying to feel their way through the lingering cosmic clouds this Spring, you will get to light up and breathe easy throughout the rest of the season. Stoner Aquarius, you have the Sun to thank for the warming days, but this month, it is the celestial alignment that ensures this May will be a chronically good one.

Stoner Aquarius, since you will be the one whose spirit feels light and shines bright, it will be up to you to serve as a gleaming guide to your fellow terrestrial cannanauts. Your positivity will be a beacon of calm to all your road weary cannabis companions.  Allow your shining aura to show them the way to a more peaceful destination. And if any of your cannabis companions do fall behind, they will always find their way back by following the scent of that sweet sinsemilla.

You don’t have to wait for summer to hit the trails my wandering Water Bearer. If the sun is shining, you should be out exploring!  Grab your travel piece, some grade-A ganja, and take your stoney sessions back to your favorite outdoors smoke spots.

The Full Moon happens on the 16th this month. It will be a great night to get together with all your partners-in-chronic to celebrate the Lunar Eclipse. You don’t have to go wild stoner Aquarius, just toke the time to light up, look to the sky, and let everyone’s troubles float away with the smoke.

Sagittarius Stoner Horoscope April

Sagittarius
Sagittarius
Sagittarius Stoner Horoscope April
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Stoner Sagittarius, with the Full Moon happening on the dawn of the month, you will experience a spark of inspiration and energy that will keep your spirit blazing throughout April!

Although it will be up to you to keep your stash jars filled with good greens and the frostiest nugs, one thing you can count on is that good times and ganja vibes will be in no short supply.

If you are a single stoner Sag, and there is an old flame you want to reignite, or a new romantic prospect you want to spend more time with, April is the perfect season to fire up a bowl together, and find out if the feeling is mutual. 

And if you already have that special cannabis companion to share that sacred smoke with, then April will be an emotionally fulfilling and fiery month for sure. 

Stoner Sagittarius, during this period when we talk about the economic grind, know that it doesn’t strictly pertain only to your time at work. You will easily rise above all expectations of your job, so right now your focus should be on the activities after you clock out for the day.

Roast up at the river my smokey Sagittarius. Fire up your favorite flower out in the meadow, or light up at the lake. Any day you are able to spark up outside of the house will be a day well spent.

Be confident my ambitious Archer that no matter how high you aim, you are sure to hit your mark in April. Know that when you are done puffing and playing out in Nature, you can return to your stoney sanctuary for a more relaxing smoke session to get some rest before the next chapter of your endo-adventure!

Scorpio Stoner Horoscope April

Scorpio
Scorpio
Scorpio Stoner Horoscope April
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Stoner Scorpio change is in the air this Spring!  Turbulent cosmic winds have knocked you back and forth for what must seem like an eternity.  Important celestial movements this month will create a new period of calm that should soothe the stoner Scorpio like a mellow edible that reaches the perfect level.

New beginnings my stable stoner Scorpion.  There is a bit of celestial magic operating at the dawn of April.  The New Moon rises in March and sets in April.  Pack a celebratory bowl of cannabis to welcome in this new phase early in the month.

Perhaps you have been working on new beginnings in your personal life.  Agents of chaos might have slowed you down.  Breathe in the calming nature of the sacred herb.  Use your ganja gifted third eye sight to see the roadmap of destiny as it unveils before your eyes.

Now is the time to use free will to progress toward your destiny stoner Scorpio.

In the work sphere there is more potential for positive change.  Whether it is a project or an occupation, many stoner Scopio’s have been feeling as if there may be new opportunities or a change in direction that could set them free from a stagnant routine.

Yes stoner Scorpio, this may be the month where meditative daydreaming turns into terrestrial action.

Keep your cannabis consumption to Sativa strains this month.  There will be a lot to do, and a lot to think about.  The creative properties of the Sativa species could loosen those mental gears obstructing progress.

One foot in front of the other stoner Scorpio.  You are marching toward your destiny.  And everything is going to be ok.

Virgo Stoner Horoscope March

Virgo
Virgo
Virgo Stoner Horoscope March
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Stoner Virgo, did you miss Valentine’s Day in February?  Perhaps the calendars are off.  The New Moon on March second is possibly your second chance at Valentine’s love.  

For partnered Virgos this means a chance at rekindling that old spark that lit the flame of the relationship.  Toke the opportunity to burn a bowl with your love.  Light the cannabis connection that assisted companionship.

For single Virgos this New Moon marks a moment for new possibilities.  You are entering a phase of opportunity for cannabis companionship.  Inhale the positive machinations of the sacred herb, and blow out the spark of manifestation.

Perhaps the February time period was more stagnant than you would prefer my lovely Virgin.  March will be the month of self motivation, and you are certainly capable of this task.

There are times to burn philosophical sacred bowls, and contemplate free-will versus destiny.  And there are times spark-up the divine inspiration contained within the magic of the sacred herb.  Get up and get moving stoner Virgo!  It’s all up to you right now.

Enjoy the month.  It gets off to a memorable emotional tone.  But then the bounty of benefits throughout the month all fall within your sphere of understanding and motivation.  

Associate action with smoke sessions.  Focus on health and body more so than heady contemplations of life, the universe, and everything.  As all things fall into place by month’s end.  Perhaps you will truly be able to question if your conscious actions got you there, or if it were destiny all along.

Taurus Stoner Horoscope March

Taurus
Taurus
Taurus Stoner Horoscope March
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My bud-loving Bull, of all in the stoner Zodiac, you have the highest times ahead of you this March. Spring is upon us, and you will get to indulge in smelling and smoking the flowers more often than most other signs in your smoke circle. 

Your forecast for the month will be filled almost exclusively with good vibes, and of course the stickiest greens. This month is a toking choose-your-own-adventure story.  Whether you choose to enjoy your nugs outdoors on a nature walk, or prefer to puff puff pass the time within the four walls of your stoney sanctuary, all sessions are blessed.

But as you puff, just be sure to pay it forward stoner Taurus. Remember that there are many of your cannabis companions who will have more trouble seeing through the smoke. 

You will be in a position to be the friend with weed this season. So, when you can, toke the time to pass the dutchie to the left, and invite those who might be stumbling to join you on your cosmic carpet ride.

Just be mindful when there are unfamiliar faces joining the smoke circle. You have every reason to be proud of all the positivity you are manifesting right now stoner Taurus. But remember that not everyone will be as immediately outgoing as you.  There will be some you encounter who will be more cautious in opening up to new people. Be patient when you encounter those who are a little more shy.

Of course, you will all have something to agree upon – good ganja.  Meet them on their level, and give it time. The best way to get everyone to join the party this month is to keep the cannabis burning, the kind words flowing, and of course my bold stoner Bull, just be yourself.

Scorpio Stoner Horoscope March

Scorpio
Scorpio
Scorpio Stoner Horoscope March
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It will be hard to deny the positivity stoner Scorpio.  The days are getting longer, and that fresh Spring feeling is traveling through the air.  I warned you that the first couple months of 2022 would be a test of internal fortitude; but now it’s time to open the curtains, smile at your neighbors, and seek out communal ganja gatherings once again!

Toke time to seal the blessings from the universe with a solo meditative smoke session on or around the New Moon of the 2nd.  Create a comfy safe space to explore your internal drives with your cannabis spirit guide.  Inhale the positivity of the plant, and exhale your positive wishes onto the terrestrial world.  The power of this manifesting marijuana meditation will be felt throughout the month.

Feel the love and positivity stoner Scorpio.  It will serve you well immediately.  Cosmic winds of conflict could arise in the work sphere in the weeks after the New Moon.  But with cannabis infused universal blessings manifesting, these conflicts will be seen as the simple obstacles that they are.  

We can’t all be on the same page, or within the same sacred space of perception.  Your internal guide will create an ease of understanding toward your fellow man that should transcend any turmoil.

Potentially the magic of the month will be surrounding the Full Moon on the 18th.  This special Moon will blast a bright glow of openness often discarded by the stoner Scorpion.  Seek out your close cannabis companions for a philosophical smoke circle of sharing.  Match bowls with the canna-crew, and share stories.

Yes, share yourself stoner Scorpio.  You never know what you might learn by stepping out with the sacred herb as your guide among close cannabis companions.

Sagittarius Stoner Horoscope March

Sagittarius
Sagittarius
Sagittarius Stoner Horoscope March
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Stoner Sagittarius it’s been a while since your true nature was able to stretch out unbridled on the terrestrial plane.  As much as you appreciate internal strategizing and building a plan, your core drives are out campaigning in the wild unknown.

This month will not satiate your internal desire, but it will continue building toward that end.  

Be prepared early in the month for communal smoke sessions with the broader smoke circle.  Stock the sacred treasure chest of cannabis with varied species and delivery methods.

The recent past has been filled with internal missions with your cannabis copilot.  Now internal sacred meditative strategizing smoke sessions will turn toward intel gathering amongst the ganja gang.  But be forewarned my stealthy Archer:  Remain rooted to your own domain or within verified safe spaces.  Universal influence surrounding outbound adventure remains obscured with inauspicious darkness.

Cosmic favor leans toward intelligent smoke sessions with the broader smoke circle, but do so only in verified, comfortable, guarded spaces.

This premonition has a double meaning as the month progresses.  What may appear to be intel gathering on a personal level for future adventure, will morph into strategizing for missions in the business sphere.  I appreciate you long for the action of battle my fierce Archer.  But no great garden of victory grew without a contemplative placement of well sewn seeds.

Yes stoner Sag, adventure is coming.  As with the internal medicated meditative smoke sessions in the recent past, this month is a natural progression supported by cosmic design toward the ends of your true purpose.  Wow, it must be heavy to be you.

Pisces Stoner Horoscope March

Pisces
Pisces
Pisces Stoner Horoscope March
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Stoner Pisces, you’ve spent the first months of 2022 playing the role of helper and healer to your cannabis companions. You were there for your smoke circle through their low moments, as well as the highs. 

But now we are in Pisces season my frisky Fish.  This month really is all about YOU! It’s time to toke a break from being everyone else’s ganja guru, and focus on giving yourself the attention that you need.

Start off the first days of March with deep and dank meditative smoke sessions. Spend time away from the smoke circle stoner Pisces; just you, your favorite pipe, and the sacred herb. 

Whether it’s your favorite secluded smoke spot, or in the comfort of your cozy stoney sanctuary; find a peaceful place where you can light up the loud, and quiet your mind.

Consider cerebrally-stimulating strains like Blue Dream or White Widow when selecting your herbal aids for these moments of medicated meditation. 

Blue Dream is ideal for when you are focused on holistic healing. Its vapors can uplift your consciousness, ease bodily tensions, and calm your spirit. It will help you enter into a contemplative state of mind without getting lost in thought, or stuck on the couch.

Stoner Pisces, switch up your prescription to White Widow when you are ready to turn reflection and exploration into implementation. It can be a bit more stimulating, and might leave you restless if you don’t have an outlet for the elevated creative energy. But it is a great strain for when you are really getting back into the groove of getting things done.

Just remember that the goal of this month’s solo smoke sessions isn’t to avoid your friends and cannabis companions. It’s about giving yourself the space and time you need to look in the mirror, and like what you see. So be mindful of your fellow tokin’ terrestrial astronauts, but stay focused on you, my friendly Fish. 

Libra Stoner Horoscope March

Libra
Libra
Libra Stoner Horoscope March
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Stoner Libra, sometimes life is like a bag of bud, and unfortunately, it’s not always going to be the top shelf kind. Sometimes it seems like the bag has more stems and seeds than anything worth smoking inside. 

When you get dealt a subpar sack you can choose to waste time picking through the unwanted parts trying to salvage worthwhile nugs. Or, you can count your losses, toss the whole thing, and try for a better bag. 

It’s only March my balanced stoner Libra!  Already you’ve experienced what seems like a year’s worth of seeds and stems. But this month it is time to let go of all the shortcomings, fire up some kinder buds, and toke a fresh start. 

The good news stoner Libra is that this month will be shwag free!  The stars have aligned in your favor, and the cosmic haze that overshadowed the first couple months of 2022 will fade, clearing the way for higher prospects. So get ready for a come up!

Of course, you will still have to work for it stoner Libra.

The first few days of March should be spent in meaningful medicated meditation. Breathe deep, inhale the perspective-expanding magic of the sacred herb. If the cosmos is bringing you a fresh start and new opportunity, you will need to know what you want to achieve, and how high you want to rise.

Don’t worry if you feel like the year has been mediocre so far.  Know that from this point forward how far you go will only be limited by what you can imagine. It’s finally your turn stoner Libra. Now it’s your time to dream big, smoke better, and manifest the magical future that you want to see!

Leo Stoner Horoscope March

Leo
Leo
Leo Stoner Horoscope March
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Stoner Leo, what do you do when a plant gets too big for its current pot? You transfer it to a bigger pot of course. Those roots need space to grow!

So far in the year you have been making forward progress, but maybe not as far and as fast as it could be. This March you too will need to find your own bigger pot with fresh, nutrient rich soil to let your roots grow deeper, and to allow room for your branches to spread.

You will always be the loud-smoking, leader-of-the-pack Lion, but right now you need to break away from the pride. It’s time to take a break from focusing on the rest of the pack to pack a bowl for one. Spend the month of March resting and reflecting on what makes you roar my stoner Lion.

It’s not about the grass being greener on the other side, it’s about nurturing your own garden so you can flourish, and grow to your greatest potential. Sometimes this means you have to shed old leaves to make way for new buds.

Your strain selection should reflect your goal of maximizing both your spiritual and physical expansion. You can go for maximum diversity by picking a couple Indica and a few Sativa options. This way you can match your strains to whatever your mood and the moment calls for. Or you can gather a few Hybrids that can be cerebrally stimulating yet will still keep you grounded in the terrestrial world.

Although growth is the theme and focus this month, know that it doesn’t stop when the month ends. Build the groundwork now stoner Leo, and you will continue growin’ and tokin’ the whole year through.

Gemini Stoner Horoscope March

Gemini
Gemini
Gemini Stoner Horoscope March
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Stoner Gemini I warned that better days of the year were around the corner.  The slow start to 2022 is over!  Get ready to rip and roll your way into a stoney cosmic adventure.

The action influence from the universe comes hot and heavy like a glob slab slammed on a glowing nail.  The New Moon on the 2nd will send cosmic waves of a shifting tide.  Pack a celebratory bowl for one on this date to welcome the change with your personal cannabis guide.

These action items will manifest in the work sphere.  Any passion projects or work tasks will get a boost from cosmic encouragement.  The wonderful nature of this influence implies that kind feedback will occur as a direct result of your actions.

Yes stoner Gemini; the only risk you run of missing out is the danger of couchlock.  Keep the stash jar loaded with energetic Sativa species to bring inspiration AND action to the forefront.

Ah my stoner Twin.  It just wouldn’t be a month worth remembering if you didn’t have some sort of battle with the dual nature of life, and within yourself.  As the month progresses there will be moments of trepidation and insecurity.

Toke a moment with the sacred herb to contemplate these situations before they get the best of you.  Perhaps, all that is needed is a positive outlook to see any obstacle or dilemma as an opportunity or learning lesson.  

These are the situations where a shared bowl with your close cannabis compadre might be the ear or sounding board needed to find the positive path.  

Good luck stoner Gemini.  There should be enough to do this month to keep you both busy!

Aries Stoner Horoscope March

Aries
Aries
Aries Stoner Horoscope March
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Ok stoner Aries, the hangover of the slow start to 2022 is over.  Did you toke time to recover in February?  A cosmic window of opportunity is opening in March.  A new day you might say is upon us.

This transition into a more positive mental space comes right away in the first Spring month.  The New Moon on the 2nd marks a universal cleansing.  But, my rambunctious Ram, the blessings of this cosmic changeover might be felt differently depending upon the recuperative steps taken in February.

Be honest stoner Aries:  Did you toke time with cannabis to slow yourself down in the final Winter month?  Did you use the sacred herb to heal, and seek internal guidance?

There is great news for those Aries who addressed their physical aches, and mental anguish, with recuperative smoke sessions.  Now the landscape will shift.  Bowls will seem a bit brighter.  Circumstances may not appear to change, but the ideas and attitudes gleaned from those sacred moments with cannabis will shift into notes of positivity and hope.

For those stoner Aries who did not heed the words to slow down, and toke time for self in February, all is not lost; but there is still work to be done.  Absolutely this New Moon on the 2nd must be used to make up for lost time.  Sink deep into self with a solo medicated meditative smoke session in a safe space.

There are dangers in leaning into a state of melancholy with an internal self assessment.  However, the universe has your back finally!  Great discoveries await by connecting you with yourself through an exercise with cannabis.  Perhaps after this exercise you can catch up to your advanced brethren, and truly feel the positive shifts in the cosmic winds during March.

No matter your past, or your future, things will start to heat up this month.  A welcome cosmic warmth for any adventurous stoner Ram.  Use the cannabis connection with your third eye sight to see the hill in front of you.  Pipes are warming, but there are many bowls yet to be burnt before the peak is mounted.

Aquarius Stoner Horoscope March

Aquarius
Aquarius
Aquarius Stoner Horoscope March
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Stoner Aquarius, if your cannabis companions want to find you this month, all they will have to do is look up! It may be true that you’ve been toking it low and slow up to this point, but as long as you aim for the stars, you will find yourself blazing to new heights in March. 

Your upward trajectory will have your fellow terrestrial travelers watching you closely.  Don’t fret my judicious Water-Bearer, observers might have red-eyes, but their stares aren’t critical. Actually, it is quite the opposite; you will have the admiring gazes of all who come into your orbit.

Because of this universal admiration, you will have the opportunity to raise up those around you. So, you will need to lead by example stoner Aquarius.

This means top shelf buds only this month! You don’t want others to see you smoking sad, shwaggy green. Remember, my chronic-loving Aquarius:  Friends don’t let their cannabis companions smoke bunk weed!

In fact, accumulating the best green bud will coincide with a cosmic mission to collect green paper as well. It takes effort to accumulate the sacred green as well as the matrix money.  But you are up to the challenge stoner Aquarius.

With all the prosperity you can expect this March, it will be important to remember the sacred stoner mantra:  Sharing IS caring.

Be mindful of your spending stoner Aquarius.  You don’t need to go overboard and burn through your stash and savings just to please others. The point is to help when you can. To share a bowl with those who find their own stash jar low, or to cover the pizza when your partner-in-chronic has had a long week, and just need a night of great ganja and good people.

Whatever you do this month, be sure to pay it forward stoner Aquarius. Now is your time to shine, but you never know when you will be the one who will need that kindness repaid.

Capricorn Stoner Horoscope February

Capricorn
Capricorn
Capricorn Stoner Horoscope February
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Stoner Capricorn, if 2021 was a bag of buds, it would have been shwag at best. And while you may have thought that the New Year was going to be more like top shelf, grade-A green, you seem to still find yourself picking through the stems and seeds of life.

But what do you do when you aren’t able to get ahold of better-quality buds? You upgrade your smoking utensils, of course! And if you want to make the most of the bag you’re dealt this month, then this is exactly the approach you will need to take. 

Unfortunately, stoner Capricorn, I can’t say that February will be any more predictable or promising. But I can say that how you approach the highs and lows during this period, and the tools you employ to rise above the uncertain times ahead, IS, within your control. And, although you can’t always change the situation you’re in, you can work to change your perspective.

The good news is my chronic-loving Capricorn, you do not have to undertake these mind-expanding exercises on your own. Fortunately, the sacred herb is more than just a magical plant that makes you giggle or gives you the munchies. Its healing vapors will also help you to introspect, reflect, and recalibrate how you respond to the challenges you face.

Stoner Capricorn, when the roads ahead are hazy and it’s hard to see, sometimes you just need to get to an elevated vantage point. So, this month, allow the sacred herb to lift your spirits and line of sight above and out of the fray.

Just remember to keep your expectations realistic stoner Capricorn. Expecting that the sky will be the limit may not be the most practical during this time, but it’s always a good idea to aim a little higher!

Gemini Stoner Horoscope February

Gemini
Gemini
Gemini Stoner Horoscope February
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Stoner Gemini, how did you make it through the dual retrograde cycle last month?  Did the magic of the sacred herb engage your super Twin power?  Well here you are, ready to shred, pack, and light up another exciting month.

Be prepared stoner Gemini, entering February will be like hitting that wall of sweet smells from the sacred herb.  You are in for a quick change of pace as the planets move on, and throw you into a different phase.

Keep smoke sessions light and airy.  Don’t dive in too deep at the beginning of the month.  Feel the change of pace with your raw psyche.  The cannabis strain does not matter, just make sure to consume just enough to get you where you want to go.

Once the beginning phase of the month is over, and you have caught your bud-loving bearings, you should feel like yourself again.  Your sense of humor will return.; your ability to adapt and thrive within a social setting will come to the forefront.  You may not have realized they were gone, but you will definitely feel them come back.  I’ll smoke to that!

Although the planetary motion will free stuck stash jars and ground joints, the new phase will bring a cooler to the work sphere and finances.  

February will be the month to take it easy on the toking.  Responsibility, accountability, and agility will be key.  Pinchie bowls go with pinching pennies.  Furthermore, a clear head may help you address some debt that is weighing you down.

The good news is that this potential tolerance break after the first six days of the month will be a breeze.  With the adaptive and communicative gears grinding once again, you may hardly notice the absence of your cannabis copilot.

Libra Stoner Horoscope February

Libra
Libra
Libra Stoner Horoscope February
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Stoner Libra, of all the signs of the stoner Zodiac, you had one of the most energetic and aspirational starts to the new year. While others were still recovering from 2021, feeling dazed and confused, you were busy planting the foundational seeds for the big come up in 2022.

You should be proud of the work you’ve put in during these first few weeks. A celebratory bowl or two are definitely in order! But there is still much to do stoner Libra, so don’t overdo it. Remember, there is a difference between lighting up a chronic bowl of calming cannabis after a long day of work, and smoking yourself into a couch-coma.

Stoner Libra, you often play the mediator and mentor to those in your inner smoke circle, helping others to see both sides of the equation and maintain spiritual balance. But this month you will have to pay close attention to your own personal inner equilibrium.

With such ambitious goals you have set for yourself it can be discouraging when you don’t see results immediately. Remember my stoner Libra, you’re in it for the long haul! Gardens don’t sprout overnight; seeds take time to grow; the dankest buds require patience and care and diligence to become extra frosty.

Stoner Libra, when it comes to your selection of sinsemilla this February, get back to your balanced roots and stick to hybrid nugs. Sometimes you will need the sacred herb to help calm your eagerness to get to the finish line. But, you will also want something that will motivate you to keep it moving and remind you that the time will come when you get to harvest the fruits of all your hard work.

Try not to spend so much time worrying about how much you’re getting done. Instead, keep to your grind, light one up, and just let it grow!

Aquarius Stoner Horoscope January

Aquarius
Aquarius
Aquarius Stoner Horoscope January
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Stoner Aquarius January will be a month of personal revelations.  As the new year begins, the universe will be sending positive waves of personal growth.

What a wonderful way to start the year my curious WaterBearer.  Open your stash jar.  Inhale the consciousness expanding gifts of the sacred herb.  Open yourself to the positivity flowing into your being.

The cannabis strain does not matter this month stoner Aquarius.  Toke time throughout the month to sink deep within when you spark a bowl to get lifted.

Your curiosity for outward puzzles will turn inward this month.  Don’t fight the feeling to find secluded moments for solo smoke sessions.  Use your cannabis copilot to guide your inquiry within.  There is still so much to learn about yourself stoner Aquarius.

This medicated meditative practice of self inquiry will be as illuminating as the Sun bringing warm rays on a cold day.  With self discovery, the terrestrial plane, and the broader smoke circle, will be unveiled with new sight.  That should make solving terrestrial puzzles so much easier!

Warning Stoner Aquarius:  The positive cosmic vibes will illuminate your aura this month.  It will seem as if your fellow terrestrial astronauts see you in a new light.  Like a magnet with positive attraction, be ready for people to gravitate toward you.  But you must find your inner chill stoner Aquarius.  Frivolous escapades will take you off your progressive mission this month.  

Find new discoveries within, and allow your inner voice to sing.

Virgo Stoner Horoscope January

Virgo
Virgo
Virgo Stoner Horoscope January
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Stoner Virgo, here … we …. GO!  The adventure of 2021 is now a memory.  We march forward into 2022 with everything we contain within. A new year to manifest our vision and being on our great terrestrial plane.

Our sacred herb is a large part of how we see the landscape in front of us.  Our cannabis copilot opens the doors to reality.  It enhances our third eye to see possibilities.

Know thyself stoner Virgo.  Often, vision isn’t your deficit.  You can create wonderful visions of manifestation, and march like a soldier to your canna-inspired destiny.  

But do you pack more than you can smoke?  Be honest stoner Virgo.  Has a dream of destiny created a mountain of tasks in the past?  Do you sometimes grind up more than you can burn down?

Drive, ambition, and creativity all must be tempered by perspective, humility, and honesty.

Use your cannabis copilot this month to slow down time.  Through regular and moderate meditations with the sacred herb, take a second look at your ambitious plans from a higher perspective. 

This medicated meditative task throughout the month will help you find balance my stoner Virgin.  The goal in life is not to pack the biggest bowl, it’s to enjoy the herb.  Don’t load what you can’t or shouldn’t smoke.  The process will be more fulfilling, and you might find more enjoyment in a higher quality manifestation.  Chill stoner Virgo.  You got this. 

Cancer Stoner Horoscope January

Cancer
Cancer
Cancer Stoner Horoscope January
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Stoner Cancer, no one would ever dare to call you complacent. In fact, you are one of the least likely of the stoner Zodiac to succumb to couchlock. But, this month, it may not be such a bad thing if you spend a little more time smoking your favorite herbs from the comfort of your soft sofa or reliable recliner.

This inclination to stay medicated and reclined, is partly due to the fact that the New Year doesn’t necessarily promise the fresh start that it will bring for some. Rest assured, you won’t be forced to relive every chaotic moment of 2021, but you should expect the cosmic haze that has clouded your vision in recent months will linger a bit longer than it will for some of your cannabis companions. 

You don’t have to curb your enthusiasm my eternally-ambitious Crab, but it will be most beneficial to your peace-of-mind if you slow your roll. 

Because this slow rolling, float-on approach is not usually your style, you will need to seek help from the soothing vapors of the sacred herb. Afterall, you don’t want to become known as the chronically cranky Crab, just because the Cosmos is cramping your style.

Open the cannabis cabinet. Seek specific sacred strains for the right moment to find your chill. A couple of my favorite strains that I would recommend during this time are the ever-sweet Gelato, and the always classic Purple Haze.  These strains, and others like them, will help to unleash your creativity without going to your head. Use your cannabis copilot to get your ideas onto paper, but soothe the urge to implement them before they are fully formed.

It may be a challenge in the first couple days of the New Year, but at least for now, my sweet stoner Cancer, the goal is to keep it lowkey and forward looking.  Stay focused on the long game, and avoid rushing ahead.

Taurus Stoner Horoscope January

Taurus
Taurus
Taurus Stoner Horoscope January
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Are you ready stoner Taurus?  I hope so.  2022 gets off to a fast start!  Make sure the stash jars are loaded, and you have enough to share.  

Universal influence in January begins as the ball drops on 2021.  Be ready by the New Moon of the 2nd.  Don’t get caught without your favorite strain or your favorite piece.

There will be strong cosmic waves of positivity centered around matters close to the heart.  This should soften the hard-charging stride of the stoner Bull.  Relationships with close cannabis companions and the stoner fam will reach new highs.

So whether you stock the stash with edible shareables or stand ready to pack a bowl for two, this month will be all about connections with cannabis.

However, be forewarned stoner Taurus:  Don’t get stuck in your own head with lofty expectations.  Don’t place your high-minded ambitions on matters of the heart.  Allow your cannabis copilot to guide you within the universal flow.  Good things will come, you just have to let them happen.

As you find your inner chill with the stoner fam, also seek moderation and caution with spending in January.  I love your ability to charge straight ahead and go for the big wins, but money matters will need more thoughtful consideration.

The beautiful aspect of the celestial influence this month is the fact that your true canna-fam only care about you, not your things.  Sink deep within your support group stoner Taurus.  Toke time to share the good green with your best buds.  Everything else will take care of itself.

Pisces Stoner Horoscope January

Pisces
Pisces
Pisces Stoner Horoscope January
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Stoner Pisces, if 2021 left you feeling dazed and confused, I’m here to remind you that you’re not alone. Remember that for every low moment, there were hazy highs that provided a counterbalance to those trying and tumultuous times.

While other stoner star signs are focused on New Year’s resolutions, for you, January is about hitting the reset button rather than a complete reimagining. So, take a few weeks to pause, puff, and truly stop to smell and smoke the flowers.

My stoner Pisces, you have been swimming through rough waters, but now you will get to enjoy a more mellow flow as you traverse new cosmic currents. There are really only two things that should be on your to-do list this month:  Cannabis and Contemplation.  There is zero reason to rush, so relax my friendly Fish. 

When it comes to the sinsemilla you smoke during this Winter season, it will be important to find strains that help to mediate your mood.

If you find yourself having trouble breaking away from the daily grind, the sacred herb can bring you solace. When the mind won’t stop racing, reach for the mellow green, my stoney Fish. Classics like Jack Herer will help you find your center, and bring you back to the here and now; other strains like AC/DC will lead you down the highway to well.

Pack the bowl with big buds of Blue Dream and OG Kush when you are vibing nice, and want to keep the positivity flowing. 

You have the whole year ahead of you to reach for the stars stoner Pisces, so for now, it is time to relax here on Earth, and recharge your cosmic spacesuit. You can always look ahead to what the future may hold, but this month, just light one up and let it be.

Smokin Js Anniversary

Sagittarius Stoner Horoscope January

Sagittarius
Sagittarius
Sagittarius Stoner Horoscope January
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It’s a new year stoner Sagittarius.  And with this change in calendar comes a cosmic breeze of energy and enthusiasm to fill your quiver.

Toke time with the sacred herb early in the month for a lifted strategy meditation session.  The New Moon on the 2nd marks a peak of cosmic energy sent your way.  Match bowls with the universe, and dare to dream stoner Sag.

But be careful my master Archer!  Avoid purebred cannabis strains.  Instead seek a nice Indica-Sativa hybrid for this energetic period.  The ideas will be flowing from your own instinct and universal support.  A pure Sativa cannabis strain could surge the energy in the universal amplifier to 11.  You aren’t a rock star stoner Sagittarius.  You are a warrior.

The important aspect of the January time period will not be in the high-minded idea generation, but instead it will be on the execution of high-minded ambitions.

Hence, a pure Sativa strain could get you stuck in a frenetic and manic stage of idea creation; and a pure Indica strain could negate the impact of the energetic universal blessing.

A 50-50 hybrid strain will utilize the perspective enhancing powers of your cannabis copilot, and leave you ready to act on your medicated meditations.

So dream big this month stoner Sagittarius, but don’t get stuck in your head.  There is action to accomplish on the terrestrial plane.  Unleash the cannabis enhanced powers of your mind, and follow the direction of your inner voice into productive battle.

Leo Stoner Horoscope January

Leo
Leo
Leo Stoner Horoscope January
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Confidant. Compassionate. Charismatic. These are all words that are appropriate when it comes to describing the stoner Leo. And of course, I would never forget, ‘cannabis enthusiast’. But there will always be some who see your generosity as showing off; those who see your unwavering loyalty as domineering.

You can’t control how other people view you stoner Leo; so don’t waste time trying. Instead, pack yourself a bowl of the frostiest greens, breathe, and let it be. The only critic you should listen to this month is you! Even with all your confidence, or maybe because of it, you know when there is room for improvement. 

Spend time in the first days of the new year meditating, inhaling the perspective-expanding magic vapors of the sacred herb. The goal of this introspection isn’t just to find something wrong that you need to fix. This kind of medicated meditation will help you to discover and identify the things that you want to make even better.

Remember my stoner Lion:  January isn’t always about making grandiose resolutions.  Sometimes it is better to use this fresh start to plant the seeds for future growth in the areas of yourself you want to see flourish in the coming year.

Most of the month will be best spent puffing and planning. You may be eager to become the best version of yourself, but remember my lovely Leo, progress requires patience. However high you wish to rise, be confident that you will ultimately get there. But if you find that you become over eager to reach your final destination, know that your cannabis copilot is there to help you slow your roll. 

This month is the time to dream big. Just remember, that even the biggest dreams, even the tallest trees, began with the smallest seed.

Capricorn Stoner Horoscope January

Capricorn
Capricorn
Capricorn Stoner Horoscope January
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For most signs in the stoner Zodiac, New Year’s festivities mark the end of the celebratory holiday season. But for the stoner Capricorn, the party is just getting started! This month, it’s time to light up, breathe in the soothing vapors of the sacred herb, and let go of your inhibitions with every exhalation. 

You are still the same hardworking, ambitious, and persistent ganja-loving Sea-Goat, but January will be a season when you have full license to embrace and explore your more lighthearted side. 

Doing your job well, and advancing in your career, is still an important investment; but you will see the most notable growth in the spiritual and social spheres of life.

Take full advantage this month of any opportunity that arises for you to puff and philosophize with your partners-in-chronic.  Don’t pass on the chance to spend time talking and toking with your fellow terrestrial astronauts. Afterall, what better way to let loose at the end of a busy day than to relax and match bowls with your best buds.

Stoner Capricorn, you shouldn’t be surprised when you see your smoke circle expand in the second Winter month. In fact, your fun-loving, free spirit approach to life right now will be hard to resist!  The only thing you have to worry about is that your pieces are clean, and your stash jars are kept full. 

When you can, plan ahead and put some thought into your social smoke sessions. Perhaps a POT-luck is in order?  Everyone can bring their favorite stoney snack and sacred strain.  By the end of the ganja-gathering, everything should be consumed. Or, you can make a day of it by indulging in some extra strength edibles, and embarking on a 420 movie marathon.

Regardless of what weather Winter might bring, you can breathe easy with the knowledge that the cosmos has nothing but positive vibes and good times in store for you. But it will be up to you to keep the ganja burning and party grooving stoner Capricorn.