Tag Archives: #aries

Aries Stoner Horoscope January

Stoner Aries the January time period will be a slow steady burn throughout the month, with a kief topped bowl to finish.  But slow down my rambunctious Ram.  This month will be like that Atari video game Pitfall:  You will have to make solid choices which direction you go, and step carefully over dangerous traps.

Decisions decisions decisions stoner Aries.  The universe will present you with a plethora of social decisions in January.  That’s good right?  So many smoke circles to pass through, and lots of canna-buddies ready to roll.  However, you must be selective.  There will be forces at work behind the cosmic curtain that will grind you down if you make the wrong choices.  For single stoner Rams, it will be best to finish the days with close cannabis companions or members of the canna-fam.  For partnered stoner Rams the days should finish with your cannabis companion.  You should not charge down the party path like a wild animal.

Although the social smoke circle will be calling throughout the month, selectivity is paramount so that energy remains strong at work and at home.  This is not the month to burn the joint at both ends.  How does that even work anyways!?!  I strongly recommend a high CBD strain of the sacred herb to pack in your bowls this month.  Amid all the opportunities to hang and chill will be an underlying tension brought on through work stress and home-life anxiety.  The high CBD dominant cannabis strain will help maintain physical health while taking the edge off those potentially frayed nerves.  

The month will build to a climax near the Full Moon of the 28th.  If you don’t maintain a sure path throughout the month, then the pressure filled climax could damage overall progress at work and at home.  But, these are not words of doom and gloom stoner Aries.  You got this.  Along with the sacred prescription for a high CBD strain, also build a solid physical regiment.  Perhaps some of the right choices in the video game of life will be targeted spots of rest and recuperation.  Maybe instead of that Tokin Tuesday smoke out, you can go home and chill with a solo sesh and a good movie like Bandersnatch.  In this choose-your-own-adventure, the ganja gang will be more than ready to take that healthy hike to that killer smoke spot on the weekend.  

Aries Stoner Horoscope December

Stoner Aries you have been burning hot all year. Being the first of the Fire signs, you are always down to ride, and ready to light one up. After another year of blazing trails, and countless stoney adventures, it’s time to slow your roll. This doesn’t mean you are coming to a complete stop, but rather, embracing a change of pace. The journey isn’t over, but the transition of one year to the next brings the realization that sometimes it’s okay to take the scenic route. So, during this holiday season my rough stoner Ram, remember to take time to smell, and smoke, the flowers. 

Stoner Aries the idea of slowing down might sound strange at first, but don’t fret. The workplace will be one outlet where you can channel all your excess energy. While home life may be more mellow than usual, you will have endless opportunities to express your creative undertakings on the clock. Your enthusiasm to get the job done, and get it done well, will help to inspire the rest of the team to keep the fires burning into the new year. But, when the job is done, don’t feel bad to take a breather. There’s no better reward for a job well done, than to settle down in your coziest smoke spot, and relax with a bowl of the sweet sensimilla.

As the month and year come to an end, it will be time to truly relax. Maybe you spend the holidays with a group of your partners in chronic, lighting up and laughing at all the hazy days gone by. Or perhaps you choose to share a bowl for two with your one and only cannabis companion, imagining the smokey days ahead. Use the down time to the fullest by celebrating both the highs and the lows, with those who mean the most. However you say goodbye to the past year, enjoy the peace while you can stoner Aries. Before you know it, 2021 will be here, and it will be time to get back to the grind.

Dragon Shooter Steamroller

Aries Stoner Horoscope November

Stoner Aries, if last month was like Float On by Modest Mouse, November will be like I Want to Break Free by Queen.  Now is the time to take the reins of your destiny.  Now is the time for self empowerment.

Ok stoner Ram, let’s take a quick smoke break before we charge head first into the great void.  After all, there is no point in charging forward with no direction or destination in mind.  Within the first trimester of November, toke time for a medicated meditative solo smoke session with the sacred herb.  Lamb’s Bread or Granddaddy Purple are perfect strains for this meditative exercise.  Focus deep within stoner Aries.  Find your center, and thus your direction will be revealed.  

The final two trimesters of November will be all about action more so than contemplation.  With your direction attained, now you can put your horns down and charge ahead.  For optimal success my fierce Ram, you must engage your third eye on this path forward.  The nice thing about floating with the universal currents is the safety in letting go.  The November path guided by your own momentum could be more treacherous.  Once again you may find assistance with specific cannabis strains.  Keep the stash jar loaded with Sour Diesel and or Green Crack for your executive adventures in November.  With these cannabis strains as your herbal assistant, your third eye sight will help root out the traps and pitfalls of your chosen path.

Stoner Aries, I have one strong note to pass for this sacred vision quest in the transition from Fall to Winter.  It may be out of season, but you must take time to plant seeds for the future during your hard charge forward in November.  Once again, your keen herbally enhanced third eye should spot the opportunities.  The seeds you plant now for success in both the work and personal spheres, will bear fruit in later time periods.  Break free stoner Aries!  Guide yourself toward positivity!

Aries Stoner Horoscope October

Stoner Aries you will grow like a pumpkin in October.  While others may be stuck in the frigidity of the second Fall month, you will be supported by a warm cosmic breeze.  With the sacred herb as your terrestrial guide, love and progress are assured.

Action is required right away in October!  The Full Moon on the 1st marks an opportunity to seize the cosmic reigns of your own stelar mission.  Find personal time near the Full Moon for a solo smoke session with the sacred herb.  The strain does not matter.  Your meditative mission on this smoke out will be to prepare yourself for the month ahead.  Support from the planetary alignment will be strongest for a stoner Ram that is nimble, and can float with the cosmic current.  This solo medicated meditative exercise will balance the chakras, and prepare your mental state for flexibility in solving problems and connecting with cannabis companions.

Stoner Aries there is more than one way to trim bud.  More than one way to roll a joint.  As you flow through the October time period, use the sacred herb to maintain a higher perspective.  From this enhanced perspective, obstacles and problems will be easier solved and overcome.  Keep these solution oriented smoke sessions light.  A little dab will do yah.  There is great power in the sacred herb; even the lightest touch can bring great impact.

Stoner Aries this is a great time to maintain and repair your cannabis community connection.  Family and close cannabis companions aren’t gone, they just haven’t been in your view for some time.  October presents a fantastic opportunity to reach out, and touch a long lost loved one.  Toke time to find a safe space to inhale the sacred herb and make the connection.  There is great power in this action, but it requires you to take the first step.  With the sacred herb as your canna-copilot, love and progress can be harvested from all spheres of life.

Aries Stoner Horoscope September

Stoner Aries, while you watch others frantically try to squeeze in a last minute road trip, or a stay-cation before autumn arrives, you welcome September contentedly.  The stoner Ram knows that they made the most out of every hot and hazy day of Summer.  But, the good times don’t have to end Stoner Aries!  It may not be at the same fiery pace you maintained in August, but you can continue your stoney adventures at a slow and steady burn, far into the fall season.  The secret to maintaining your groove will be to keep a balanced budget regarding both your finances, and your spiritual energy.  You might always be ready to hike to an elevated smoke spot, or to take a ride with your partners-in-chronic to enjoy cannabis on the coast.  But be forewarned:  You won’t get very far unless you have enough green to put gas in the tank, and enough left in your stash to toke up when you finally arrive.  

Stoner Aries the workplace will be a time of great accomplishment and advancement, as long as you are able to avoid butting heads with coworkers.  Even if you are in a leadership position, remember you are still one of the team.  Not everyone will always like the tasks they are assigned, but instead of reprimanding skeptics, redirect them.  Use the sacred herb as a catalyst to illuminate the vision of the big picture, and help everyone to see the impact of individual contributions.  But, keep in mind that communication is a two-way street stoner Aries.  Just because someone’s idea seems half-baked, or was not part of the original action plan, doesn’t mean it’s not worth hearing.  Your most important job is to promote peace, progress and innovation.  If the team is able to puff puff pass on the dramatics, productivity will reach record highs.  

September is here and it’s time to clear your head.  It’s always recommended you keep the stash jar full, and the air hazy stoner Aries!  But there may be a fog that has been hanging over your head.  Perhaps there is uncertainty that has been holding you back from taking your relationships to the next level.  While it is true that cannabis can help you expand your mind, it can also be a catalyst in strengthening connections with your partners-in-chronic.  So embrace the sacred herb stoner Aries.  Light one up and let go of fear.  You may be surprised to find that it was all in your head all along, and the canna crew has been waiting for you to rejoin the smoke circle.

Dragon Shooter Steamroller

Aries Stoner Horoscope August

August finds the stoner Aries feeling themselves, cruising along in an above average groove that can be expected to flow throughout the entirety of the month.  As the first of the stoner Zodiac, you will ultimately have executive decision making authority as to how the smokey scenes play out during the cannabis infused chapters of your Summer.  Although you may find yourself at the helm, commander of your cosmic space cruiser, understand that the journey will be much more memorable with a trusted partner-in-chronic sitting shotgun!  A trusted co-pilot can mean the difference between smokin’ solo, or having someone to puff puff pass with when you need to pause, and pack a bowl, at a crucial crossroad.  In other words, they can be the canna-confidant who talks, and tokes, with you before you pick which path you hope leads to greener pastures. 

Stoner Aries while it can be helpful and lucrative to keep the long-game in mind, don’t plan out your calendar for work too far in advance this month.  Circumstances are subject to, and are likely to, change.  Your most valuable asset in your sacred tool chest during this season will be flexibility.  Even the most well-rolled joint can tear and run unexpectedly.  These stoner boner tears may also affect projects you were certain were a surefire win.  Don’t panic stoner Aries!  Assess, adapt, and apply the new approaches necessary to get the job done.  Use the sacred herb to enhance your elevated third eye vision.  As long as you are learning as you go, you can turn setbacks into new skills, and reimagine obstacles as opportunities, to advance toward higher levels of achievement.  You can’t always avoid the possibility of the stash having a couple seeds in it, but you may be pleasantly surprised by what may grow if you plant them.

When it comes to recreation and relationships, the stars have aligned to deliver the stoner Aries the greatest good vibes of the season.  The only way drama will find you my irrepressible Ram, is if you go looking for it.  Keep puffing and passing to those you already consider to be a part of your most inner smoke circle.  You can count on any ill will, or unwanted negativity, to get lost in the haze.  Stick with your trustworthy tokin’ terrestrial astronauts, and your tried-and-true cannabis strains stoner Aries, and you are sure to keep your spirit high all Summer.

Aries Stoner Horoscope July

Stoner Aries you will begin the summer feeling as fiery as ever!  You are still experiencing the afterglow of a sweetly successful June, and you are ready for more!  After the first week you may notice these feelings of satisfaction dim, but don’t worry.  It would be unreasonable to maintain such a fervent sprint for the entire month.  Instead, find a more sustainable pace, and move through July at a steady slow-burn.  You’re playing the long-game stoner Aries.  Budget your efforts, and energy, so you can keep the good vibes flowing until Fall.  

There will always be the urge to second guess, to reexamine recently completed projects, and notice something you could have done better.  Don’t dwell on what could have been done differently stoner Aries; instead use lessons learned to improve the outcomes of future endeavors.  And remember, not all work is done on the clock.  Brainstorm with a fresh bowl at home. Seeking herbal inspiration during downtime could be the secret sauce for success at work.  While there are times to smoke in order to find solid ground, this season, cannabis will help to catapult you to a higher vantage point.  From this ten thousand foot view, you will be able to better see the bigger picture, and easily avoid obstacles down the road.  Your coworkers will look to you for guidance during this period my stout stoner Ram.  You are more than able to lead them, as long as you are willing to rise to the occasion.

Stoner Aries this month you can expect to accrue a great deal of social capital as a result of your own elevated spirit. Take advantage of this by making time to recreate with your fellow cannabis connoisseurs.  Whether it is in your own backyard, or against the backdrop of a majestic mountain landscape, toke good and toke often.  But, don’t worry about how big your smoke circle is, only how smoke-filled your days are.  When it comes to the greens you puff, and the people you pass them too, always aim for higher quality, not quantity. 

Aries Stoner Horoscope June

Stoner Aries sometimes we plant seeds, envisioning only the bountiful crop that is sure to come.  We forget all the work that it takes to nurture those tiny saplings into full-grown, flowering beauties.  Take off those rose colored glasses, the world will soon be bright enough.  This does not mean you should lower your expectations, or have more modest goals.  As long as you remember there is plenty of weeding and pruning to be done, and are willing to get your hands dirty, you will see all of your aspirations manifest into tangible results.  Remain humble and stay diligent stoner Aries.  As you find your groove in the latter half of the month, it will be easy to forget the rough patches from the first weeks of June.  While you watch your efforts grow into healthy and hearty results, remember there is still much work to be done.  

Stoner Aries the best strategy in the workplace this month will be continual and concerted cooperation.  You may be the stoner Ram with the plan, but it will take many hands to turn your ideas into reality.  Even if you are elected project leader, do not ignore the opinions of your peers.  Career advancement will be directly correlated to your ability to balance work and home events.  While it is crucial to stay on the grind when you’re on the job, it will be equally important to slow the burn when you’re off the clock.  Use personal time to cloud the room, and clear your mind.  Whether you prefer Indica or Sativa, you may find some of your best creative thinking happens in the company of the sacred herb. Take notes with the marijuana tokes stoner Aries! We all have those smoke-inspired epiphanies and realizations.  The true test for manifestation of such enlightened ideas is being able to remember them later.  

Are you ready stoner Aries?  Summer is almost here, and the weather is not the only thing heating up.  With the long days, long standing relationships between cannabis companions and fellow tokers will be taken to a higher level.  The secret to strengthening these bonds will be sharing all the delights and challenges equally.  Share the burdens, and the sticky buds alike.  Invite the canna-fam to enjoy in your many endo-excursions, and maybe even help you burn through your extra special stash.  Together you can put the bright days of June to good use:  Finding secret secluded smoke spots, creating your favorite cannabis recipes, and making lasting memories during this herbally infused month. 

Aries Stoner Horoscope May

The temperature is rising and so is your outlook stoner Aries.  Overall, optimism will rise throughout the month.  Of course not every day will be sunshine and rainbows, but the cosmic forecast is promising.  Your positivity will attract those who cross your path, and you will be in the unique position to share the good vibes.  During the first week, make sure you toke time to burn one down by yourself.  These moments of meditating, and medicating, without external distractions, will be the time to get grounded stoner Aries.  Find your center, align your chakras, and prepare for the quickly approaching summer!  Sometimes the best way to clear the mind is by getting the room a little hazy.  When the smoke clears, your mindset will be even brighter, and your spirit ever the higher.  

Stoner Aries the work crew may be feeling the wear and tear of a long and draining period.  But, remember who your peers are; you are all working toward a common goal, and the team should remember, a win for one is a win for all.  After an uphill start in the beginning, by mid month, the team will be back to performing like a well rolled joint:  Burning full steam ahead like two nugs in the same bowl.  Keep this in mind throughout the remainder of the May work calendar.  The stoner Aries who are fortunate enough to get to blaze with their coworkers will find a mellow, yet motivated mood prevailing in the second half of the month.  Those who do not get to toke with the team will still find their spirits uplifted by the sacred herb during their time off the clock.

It is important this May to remember one thing stoner Aries:  Words matter!  Not only what you say, but how you choose to say it when expressing yourself.  Be open and honest with your partner-in-chronic, and close cannabis companions.  When you speak, they will take to heart your message.  Similarly, during this period, you equally need to be an active and empathetic listener.  If communication hits a roadblock, find the trusted peace pipe, light one up, and meet your cannabis companions on a higher level.  It will always be easier to see eye to eye when everyone has an elevated vantage point.  

Aries Stoner Horoscope April

Stoner Aries there will be cosmic blessings in April, but they may come with growing pains.  The universal influence will bring winds of change as you embark on a process of rebirth. However, this personal growth will come with emotional trials.  As you shed your former skin, and renew your self confident spirit, the journey may be difficult. But the greatest rewards don’t come without great effort.

Often we speak of universal influence as if we are not in control of our destiny.  However, the planets are merely a partner in your great adventure on the terrestrial plane.  Toke time early in the month to medicate and meditate with the sacred herb. A deep solo smoke session is required to delve into the concept of forgiveness.  You see, often we hold ourselves back from great personal growth by holding on to disappointments or injuries of the past. If they are not confronted, they can ride with us like a backpack of emotional weight.  This month holds a great opportunity to shed yourself of this weighty backpack stoner Aries. Granddaddy Purple or Lamb’s Bread will work perfect for this deep meditative dive. Relax stoner Aries, inhale the sacred herb and open up that backpack.  Put the emotional weight of past transgressions down forever. Forgive yourself, or you will never stop blaming yourself. Leave the weight of history behind.

Pursuit of a love interest should wait until after the cloudy exercise of emptying your backpack is complete.  But, be ready for magic once you complete your emotional task stoner Aries. If all goes well with your deep medicated meditative dive with the sacred herb, you will come out feeling like a new you.  Pump up the jam. Embrace that new confident stride. All eyes will be on you. Be sure to take the new you for a spin with some smoke circle acquaintances and the canna-crew in the second half of the month.  The deep contemplation will be over, and the puff puff parties will be plentiful. Be sure to practice safe toking stoner Aries.