The Stoner Aquarius is a blessed soul. Look for this water bearer to be leading the cannabis leagalization rally.

Google Play

Want a notification each month? Check out the podcast version of the horoscope!

Aquarius March 2018

Stoner Aquarius, you should prepare yourself to encounter disappointments and setbacks this month. Although this may sound like a bad thing, do not worry, these are called growing pains. While not everything you undertake will result in your preferred outcome, this is simply because you are entering into uncharted territories. And like with any new endeavor comes the increased chance of encountering unexpected outcomes. If you are able to maintain a positive level of optimism, you will quickly realize these are opportunities for exponential growth, not just grumbling. You will benefit from some substantial meditative sessions. Spend some time contemplating with your favorite strain–you will be reminded that our perspective can mean the difference of seeing the nug jar half empty or half full.

While there might be many who will offer their advice as to how to best tackle the tasks in front of you, Stoner Aquarius, remember that you are the one who ultimately decides the course of action. When you are faced with contradicting advice between what someone else recommends or what you feel is the best path, follow your heart. While it is always a good practice to listen to others, it is best to take these inputs with a grain of salt or a gram of weed. That is to say, allow yourself to the chance to reflect upon the situation at hand before moving forward. The best of both worlds will be to set your mind to your specific goals, know what you think serve you best to accomplish said goals, and rely only upon the input of your closest partners in chronic.

Although it is recommended you stand by your convictions when it comes to your opinions and efforts with regards to the workplace, it will be be of the utmost importance for you to remain pliable when it comes to dealing with matters of the home. This month, there will be no need to sacrifice your ambitions for those nearest to you, however, it will be important for you to acknowledge and address their needs. Whether this means bonding over a bowl of our sacred herb, or late nights conversing and listening to those dearest, all involved will be able to feel their moods elevated to a higher state.

Aquarius February 2018

Stoner Aquarius February has the potential to be huge! Pick up some gold blunt wraps because there will sure to be an occasion to celebrate. You know how this goes stoner Aquarius; I set you up big and then let you down gently. The big cosmic trick to February is that the celebratory celestial support will only come if the seeds have been planted and nurtured in the past.

February will be a positive period for you stoner Aquarius. However, don’t think of this period as lucky or fortunate. The fruit of this fortunate plant will be determined by the love and attention applied during cultivation. For some stoner Aquarius February will be the culmination of a large project or idea. It’s time to lean hard into the final stretch of this passionate project; for now is the time to switch from striving to achieving.

For those stoner Aquarians who do not have a project planted, there is still opportunity to be found in February. Take time early in the month to meditate with the sacred herb. Seek positivity and clarity about your ambitions and passion. If you do not have a passion project ready to reach is cultivated culmination this month, this is simply an opportunity to start a passion project. What you start now will become the celebratory blessing in the future.

Let’s not leave Valentine’s Day out of our cosmic analysis. It’s time for you to take the lead stoner Aquarius. Whether you are single or in a committed relationship, confidence and assertiveness will assist in your loving endeavors. Once again stoner Aquarius, have you planted the seeds of love? You will be much more likely to harvest the companionship of another if your have already fertilized and tilled the soil. Stumbling upon a new cannabis companion will be unlikely, but taking an existing cannabuddy to the next level will be possible in February.

Good luck stoner Aquarius, be bold and seize the day!

Aquarius January 2018

Stoner Aquarius, while some will commence this 2018 New Year with a running start, it will be best if you settle into a deliberate pace. It is important you continue to look ahead to the future, but possibly even more important is to be sure of your plans before you embark on any new adventure. This advice holds true during most times, but with all of the ambiguity the new year brings, it will be even more pertinent now. Although it is recommended you proceed with caution, you definitely want to avoid couchlock. Find yourself a good Sativa strain, and stick with it during the start of a new year. While change will occur slowly, and hopefully on your part, deliberately, it will be most beneficial to maintain forward momentum. By harnessing the creative properties of uplifting Sativas, you will be able to make more efficient movement of the choices you make.

Although you are embarking on a new year, with new surprises and experiences, it will be important to finish old projects before you explore any uncharted territories. This is simply a call back to the notion that it will be imperative to be sure of your path forward before you proceed. Counter to the idea of going nowhere fast, you will see more substantial and fruitful results from all of your endeavors. By taking the time to look ahead, you will be able to identify any roadblocks and obstacles that could hinder your success. Because of your diligence, you will not waste time, unnecessarily doing a task twice. This means you will have a good balance between work and relaxing.

Being mindful, Stoner Aquarius, also means paying attention to your stash levels. You definitely do not want to go to pack a celebratory bowl for a job well done, only to find your stash jar is empty! Plus, your peaceful vibes are certain to be noticed by friends and family. You don’t want to disappoint when a loved one needs you to share a special bowl with them.

Your desires and goals, by no means should take a backseat. However, you are likely to find your loved ones to be front and center in many of your pursuits. By focusing on what is right in front of you, peace, love, and harmony will permeate every part and person who is fortunate enough to cross your path.

Aquarius December 2017

Stoner Aquarius December will be an active month. Both the personal sphere and work sphere will be filled with positivity. These two spheres must be kept separate however, as your green living could negatively impact your green earning. There will be enough activity in both worlds to keep you busy planning the next project meeting or interview and the next smoke spot rendezvous. Just be sure to take breaks from your busy work life to enjoy cannabis companions and the terrestrial experience.

Beware of detachment stoner Aquarius. We all need help from time to time working out a problem or solving a puzzle. This month you will need help from a cannabis companion. When you have an unresolved issue, be sure to toke about it with a friend. Nobody can help you if you keep your dilemma to yourself. Spark one up with a cannabis companion and open yourself up to receiving help and companionship.

Work will play a prominent part of your holiday season stoner Aquarius. If you are unemployed or seeking a new employer, keep your efforts high. Positive cosmic winds are blowing in a productive direction. For those with gainful employment, be ready for more responsibility and opportunity. Be forewarned stoner Aquarius, your work is not the place for a higher consciousness. Save the bowls for nights out with friends. You will need your wits about you at work to take full advantage of cosmic blessings this month. Foes in the work sphere will take advantage of real or even perceived stoner stigmas. You will have plenty of energy to fight them off and present yourself as the natural leader you are. With a sharp mind and able spirit, you can overcome conflict to build consensus. You will be a shining star to your employer.

Save the date! December 21st, the Thursday before Christmas. There is a special positive planetary alignment that will have you singing in the streets. Be sure to plan out your day and night with your PIC (partners in chronic).

Aquarius November 2017

The stars have aligned and the universe has your best intentions in mind, Stoner Aquarius, but remember that your efforts are the ultimate factor in whether you meet with failure or success. This means that the successes you achieve will be directly correlated to the amount of positive input you invest, so set your goals high. You will be able to magnify this positive momentum you are building by tackling problems and tasks with a group effort. A friend with green is a friend indeed, so enlist your closest bud-loving buddies to share in the ganja and the glory. Even the greatest endeavors will become much smaller if the work is divided up amongst many minds.

Be confident that your achievements, big and small, will be noticed by management at work–even if they are not vocally acknowledged by your higher-ups. Your optimism and energy will be tangible this month and you will be able to improve the spirits of your coworkers. These attributes have made you noticeably valuable in your job. While you experience a time of great harvests, use this opportunity of great fortune to share with others this plentiful bounty. Some say that, “sharing is caring,” and your actions during this month will strengthen this age old adage. Passing around the peacepipe will create the perfect forum for analysis and advancement of every party’s prosperity.

Smoke buddies will certainly come and go, Stoner Aquarius. There are those who will linger for a while, and those who will be at your side during the most chaotic or charismatic times. During this autumn month, you will discover who will be down to ride with you for the long haul. While the quantity of those you are willing to share in your puff-puff-pass adventures might be fewer, the quality of your adventures will be elevated. Being more selective about who you share the sacred herb with, will only make each moment shared more memorable.

Aquarius October 2017

As the Halloween month arrives, Stoner Aquarius, you are feeling at the top of your game. You may have climbed and conquered many mountains during the summer season, be it metaphorically or literally, but you may also feel like there are tasks left undone. Perhaps there is still that one rock left unturned, that road untraveled, or that one nugg left unsmoked. It is important that whatever remains, that you give it your best shot. Those nearest to you have certainly noticed an improvement in confidence and competence. You have found your groove, it will be important that you stay focused on maintaining this streak of success by keeping busy. Avoid Indica-dominant strains that might lead you to couch-lock and inhibit your forward motion.

For you, it may not always come down to financial motivations, Stoner Aquarius. Your peers will definitely notice that you have a plan, as well as the knowhow to put those plans into action. Your accomplishments can and will be restricted, only by your own initiative. Lay down the pipe, even if this is only with regard to the workplace. You will be able to offer new solutions and new perspective to old problems, but you do not want to limit your chances by clouding the senses. You will find yourself to be in tune to the subtle nuances of the cosmos, you simply need to ensure that you are of the mindset to do so.

While the workplace may bring new challenges and problems to solve, you will find your inner peace on the homefront. An ancient wisdom declares that, ‘sharing is caring.’ You may feel drained from the demands of work, but you are certain to find a second wind when it comes to your personal sphere. You will only benefit from packing the peace pipe and passing it around. This may bolster moral for you and your squad, or perhaps stoke the fire shared with your cannabis companion. Whether it is romantic, or recreational, you and members of your stoney circle will find solace in our evermost sacred herb.

Aquarius September 2017

This September, Stoner Aquarius, you will be readily equipped to tighten up any loose ends that you may be dealing with. You have much business to finalize, however, you will have all the resources necessary to get everything done. Just remember that the difference between success and failure will be up to you. As the seasons transition, you will have the responsibility to make the most of what you’ve got. As they say: recycle, reduce, reuse. Maybe you have some unfinished roaches, or half-finished bowls that can be transformed into something completely new. Whether it is a leftover bowl that needs to be finished, or simply the final touches on that big project that you need to finish up, this is the time to get it done.

Sometimes, we are able to get high with a little help from our friends. During September, you will be that friend who is able to help. It may be coworkers who are not able to see the missing piece of the puzzle to finish that difficult task at work. It may be a close friend who just can’t seem to see the bigger picture. But, with a little help from you, inspired by your favorite cannabis strain, your combined creative energies will be able to get the job done. However, it is not advised that you, or your peers, look strictly for the quick fix. The best use of your efforts will be to solve the problems at hand, but to look further down the road at the long run.

While there will certainly be winds-of-change surrounding you, Stoner Aquarius, you will do best if you are able to stay grounded. Instead of pursuing the highest points, you will encounter more substantial results if you are able to stay grounded. Keep to the Indica varieties of our favorite herb and you will be able maintain a consistent, solid foundation, for when those nearest to you might need a hand to hold onto.

Aquarius August 2017

During this month of August, Stoner Aquarius, it will be best advised to invest your energies into the long term. Avoid unnecessary distractions, as these will only slow you down, or divert you from your original goals. It may not be a bad idea to look into acquiring some nice sticky sativas, as you will be embarking upon multiple spiritual endeavors this month, and the boosts in creativity could be helpful. The old adage, of “sharing is caring,” will be additionally important during this time. While you may feel like you are ready to take on the world, be certain to not turn down a helping hand when it is offered.

Your creativity will be a focal point during this time, as ingenuitive approaches to unexpected problems will help to smooth out results and avoid unnecessary disagreements at work. You may come to find that you are experiencing new found passions in your career life. Embrace these feelings stoner Aquarius. While they may seem foreign initially, the long term payoff will be more than worth it. If you are able to keep your professional work and your smoking work distinctly separate, then ultimately, success is a sure bet.

As summer comes to a close, you will notice a significant expansion of your inner smoking circle. These new connections may arrive in the most unexpected of places, but it will be best to embrace these new opportunities to make new friends. While you are able to offer support to those who need it, don’t hesitate to ask for help when needed. Summer may be waning, but there is still ample opportunity to make the most of the sunshine left at hand.

Aquarius July 2017

Stoner Aquarius, you may find yourself this month with an unexpected feeling of disbelief. But, don’t worry, what you are actually experiencing is amazement at a new found peace you will discover. While at first you may not know exactly how to handle this blessing, the best advice will be to embrace it. Although it will be important to take advantage of this stage in life, it will be equally necessary to stay grounded. While others might pack a bowl or roll one up to escape for a while, you will find that the sacred herb will help remind you of your immediate surroundings. If you are able to find a balance between this time of bliss, and handling business, you can expect to experience success in all of your undertakings.

Whether you have recently started a new job, or you have been in your current career for some time, you should expect an increased confidence in your abilities to accomplish tasks before you. As you become more and more familiar with what is expected from you at work, you will show the higher-ups that your competence should not be question. Seek out and find that sweet smoking sativa, Stoner Aquarius. This will be precisely the lift you will need to keep you in the zone and clearly focused on your goals.

Towards the end of the month, Stoner Aquarius, you might feel yourself slowing down or running out of energy. You do not have to worry about this because your accomplishments will be many and noticeable. And, the good news is that you will have the support of your closest buds. If you find that your mood is lower than you want, know that you can make it higher with a little help from your friends. Whether it’s help finishing a do-it-yourself project, or help finishing a freshly packed bowl, be confident that your loved ones will have your back. Collectively, you and yours will be more than able to conquer all the wonderful surprises summer has in store.


Stoner Aquarius, just like the spring flowers blossoming beneath the summer sun, so will you too experience noticeable offshoots and new growth. These expansions of self may not always be in the area you would expect, but new undertakings and meeting new people is a guaranteed part of your future. Wherever your path leads, you will be able to maintain your relaxed, yet steady pace. That is to say, it will be nearly impossible to throw you off your groove, stoner Aquarius. While it is recommended that you take time to stop and smell the roses, maybe smoke some sacred flowers, don’t spend too much time with your head in the clouds.

Whether you are a self-employed Aquarian, or recently started in a new position, you will accomplish all of your endeavors. However, this depends on if you are able to look down the road to see the potential bumps ahead. Do this and you will quickly move from one task to the next, each being more easily accomplished and successful than that last. It will be important for you to do whatever it takes to keep the peace. Whether you are close enough with your coworkers to enjoy passing around the peace-pipe, or you maintain a more formal relationship, it will be up to you to keep the chaos at bay. As long as you are able to keep in good standing with your peers, you will be able to solve even the most unexpected challenges.

Since you will not need to worry about the realm of work, you will be able to invest most of your energies into the personal sphere. The best advice is to burn it slow, Stoner Aquarius. There will be many opportunities to enjoy some serious quality time with friends and family, so be sure that you are fully present during these moments. Keep your smoke circle small this month. This will mean everybody gets to enjoy a bit more of our favorite herb and you will know for sure that everyone in the squad will be down to ride. Although you may encounter many new faces along your travels, the most important focus should be the best buds you already have.