Tag Archives: zodiac sign

Cancer Stoner Horoscope August

August will be a time of repair and reflection for the stoner Cancer.

The final summer month should not be labeled as selfish, but cosmic influence will support an internal focus. There will be many opportunities to steal away from the hustle, bustle, and drama of the terrestrial world. Your mission is to seek out and toke these opportunities where they come.

There is no sacred strain prescription for you this month. Moments of clarity and internal connection will be found in unlikely places. Even though a medicated meditative deep internal dive with the sacred herb in a quiet dark room is on the agenda, energetic activities may also provide moments of deep internal contemplation. Pack a bowl and seek your soul whenever the opportunity arises. Even within crowds of terrestrial astronauts you will be able to float away to the depths of your being.

Use these solitary moments of contemplation to align your terrestrial experience with your cosmic mission. Often we veer off the path of progress when we battle the obstacles of the material world. There is something your internal guide needs to share with you. Perhaps there is something wrong with your cosmic spacesuit you have been ignoring. Or there is an obstacle you’ve been avoiding that is blocking your path. The meditative sessions with the sacred herb will illuminate these issues, and allow you to truly see what needs to be accomplished. Not for the world around you, but for yourself.

Be forewarned stoner Cancer: Do not lock yourself away for all of these medicated internal journeys. This temptation may persist throughout the month. Even though the dramatic noise of smoke circle squabbling can distract you from your internal thoughts, there will be moments available with the cannabis crew for deep introspection. However, if the noise of fellow terrestrial astronauts is too much to hear yourself think, be sure to have your escape hatch ready for launch.

Aries Stoner Horoscope August

Stoner Aries push hesitancy aside, and dispose of all reservations. This is the season of the Fire Sign! The universe will send a kick of energy and confidence your way in the final month of summer. While stress is likely, success is even more certain. You can expect to make great strides in the things that may bring you the most trepidation. Strive for success stoner Aries, not speed. There will be plenty of wins that come with great ease, but you should be prepared to go in hard with a steady grind. August is all about achieving balance: Push for fun accomplishments early in the month, but be willing to work toward more practical and humble goals toward the end of the month.

The sacred herbal prescription for August is a balanced hybrid. The month will be comprised of many ups, but how you react to the downs will be crucial. Balance could be the key between substantial success, and missing your mark. Operating outside of your comfort zone is exhilarating, but at the same time it can produce an aura of anxiety. The Sativa side of things will help you settle into a succinct groove, handling business and checking off that to-do list. And the Indica influences will help flip those pangs of anxiety into feelings of well-being. The balanced result will turn the negative energy into positive action.

Be forewarned stoner Aries: Proceed with caution when playing with fellow terrestrial astronauts. A bold cosmic wind could bring out more from you than your smoke circle is ready for. While they might be surprised, your response to their surprise will be the deciding factor. It is up to you stoner Aries, whether you proceed with a hot head, or play it cool. If needed, take a time out for a solo smoke sesh. Puff, puff, pass the time reflecting on where you’re at, and where you want to go.

Seek a progressive smoke session with the sacred herb early in the month while confidence is high. There will be many adventures and distractions that keep you from this task, but this is the most optimal time to take a deep meditative dive into yourself. Seek inner understanding and alignment of your chakras. With this session, success in August will be more likely, and more impactful toward long term progress.

Aries Stoner Horoscope July 2019

Stoner Aries the second summer month will be a time of doing! The current planetary alignment will support, and almost require, a frenetic pace. Leave the full bodied Indica strains in the stash box. Sativa strains and Sativa dominant hybrids will be the sacred prescription for July.

Doing, not spending, stoner Aries. The terrestrial missions and project fulfillment of July must be accomplished with hard work or acute intellect, not through monetary spending. Too many times terrestrial astronauts assign accomplishment to material assets. The universal support this month is more about internal progress and task management than material trinkets. However, there is nothing holding you back from increased earnings during this energetic month.

Toke time early in the month to fly high above the terrestrial plane on a medicated meditative smoke session with the sacred herb. From these medicated highs, the stoner Aries will be able to see life in context from a broader perspective. Think of this meditative moment as a tool for organizing the frenetic energy toward internal progress. Aligning bountiful opportunities with internal desire will help take the edge off the frenetic pace, and illuminate the desired pathway. Opportunities will be abundant in July. Take on as many as possible. Success will be assured with a contemplative plan of action, and organized methodology of progress.

Before the month concludes, toke time for another deep medicated meditative dive with the sacred herb. This meditative smoke session will act as a book end to a crazy busy period. Seek insight into how the actions of the month related to internal desires. Now, instead of flying high above the terrestrial plane, sink deep into yourself for connected analysis. An Indica strain can be applied for this meditative download. This final action of July could lead to breakthroughs for future time periods.

Burn one for me you delightful busy bee.

Aquarius Stoner Horoscope July 2019

Stoner Aquarius summer is in full bloom. You can expect every meaning of the word to manifest in excess this season. You are heating up and should make necessary preparations for the hot streak that is your future. It will be important to nurture your physical needs first; then proceed full speed ahead with your mission of channeling creativity into a greater, greener cosmos. Maintaining a well nourished, and hydrated cosmic spacesuit will keep your spirits feeling fresh, your mind finely tuned. Hydration is crucial as you embark upon a real life game of chutes and ladders. You can expect a persistent series of ups and downs. Ease the mind and rest assured stoner Aquarius. Burn one down and light one up when necessary. Vertical progress will be high and frequent, with downward slides being few and with only shallow dips.

Hard work and concentration will be required for every success in the work field. During July there will be overwhelming opportunities, with what might feel like too little time. Call upon the sacred herb to maintain a can-do attitude while creating cosmic beauty all around you. It’s advised you stick to Sativa or Sativa dominant hybrid strains this month. This prescription will invoke inspiration, and boost energy to help you multitask your way to higher levels of achievement. Puff puff plan to feel overwhelmed at times; the month really does hold that much potential and promise. Don’t forget to stop and smoke the flowers stoner Aquarius. Checking off the to-dos and completing grand projects should be a priority; but it is also important we take the time to acknowledge and admire our accomplishments. After a job well done, you can enjoy a joint well rolled while preparing for your next series of successes.

Between the work realm and home life, the theme of the season will be shared: Knowing when to give freely, and when to hold something back. You do not need to reveal every ingredient of your secret-to-success sauce. Some sneaky peekers may try to overtake your operations if they know your inner workings. While you want to help the group as a whole, sometimes it’s okay to leave a little something to mystery. When it comes to your cannabis crew, you will always find truth in the saying “sharing is caring.” By the end of the month, you may notice your smoke circle has grown. Use the sacred herb as a catalyst to draw like minded tokin’ terrestrial astronauts into your orbit, and together your cosmic adventures will bloom bright for all to admire.

Aries Stoner Horoscope June 2019

Stoner Aries the month of June is a mixed bag of sacred herb. A bit of swag with a bit of kind bud. As with the usual mantra of life, the blessings of June will be what you make of your mixed bag.

The work sphere has immense potential this month. However, there will be no safe space for your cannabis enthusiasm in the workplace. Be mindful to keep a clear line of separation with workplace activities and smoke circle enjoyment. It is also true that you will need to view business activities with clear eyes. Any smoke clouds at work could obscure and hide necessary tasks. All diligent efforts in the business sphere will pay off by the end of the June time period. Attack stoner Aries! With clear sight and a motivated heart, attack your work responsibilities with vigor.

After the work day is complete, blow off steam with sweet sacred greens. Try to find an Indica dominate hybrid strain for the after work parties. Enlist the support of your cannabis cohorts. The sacred herb is best enjoyed in a circle with your best buds. Be forewarned stoner Aries: The clear line of work and cannabis includes the smoke circle. Your recuperative smoke sessions should be with cannabis companions, not work buds.

The planets have aligned in June to assist the stoner Aries on a mission for self improvement. Cardio workouts are always good for your cosmic spacesuit, but you need to strive for more during this period. Attention to the physical condition of your cosmic spacesuit is important and necessary, but time and energy must be given to the emotional soul inside the physical suit. Find a way to workout among your fellow terrestrial astronauts. Seek recuperative enjoyment from your physical exercise. This will differ from one stoner Aries to another, but toke time with the sacred herb to contemplate your passionate personal desires. These efforts will harden your space suit and brighten your soul.

Aquarius Stoner Horoscope June 2019

Inhale, breathe deep, and let it be stoner Aquarius. The month of June sets up to be a reparative relaxed time. The planets have aligned into a calm configuration where troubles and obstacles will be resolved with ease and without harm. All strains of the sacred herb are at your disposal this month. With this calm cosmic configuration, focus can confidently be placed on internal ambitions.

The first summer month may feel like time is slowing down for the stoner Aquarius. However, this won’t be the case for all your cannabis companions and smoke circle acquaintances. The key to June will be understanding and perspective. Not just understanding the pace of others, but also understanding your own internal situation. Do not expect others to travel at your pace, and certainly avoid any pressure to match their speed. Live and let live, or smoke and let smoke can be your motto in June.

Keep your stash jar loaded stoner Aquarius. Puff puff pass on the stress of a deadline, and sink deep into internal contemplation. Thorough analysis of an obstacle or situation will lead you down the best path to success and progression. June will not require you to morph into a stoner Buddha, or a weed infused philosopher; but the business and personal spheres will be best navigated with your thinking cap firmly fitted.

During this melodic and methodical period, toke time for meditative smoke sessions focused on self. Keen insights will be gained during June, drawing you closer to your internal self, motives, and destiny. With the right blend of the sacred herb and introspection, the stoner Aquarius could reach internal breakthroughs that launch them toward progress in future time periods. Blast off my deep thinking terrestrial astronaut. Cosmic understanding will be found at the deep edges of yourself.

Virgo Stoner Horoscope May 2019

Stoner Virgo, the final month of spring will be marked by a rain of positivity from a supportive celestial alignment. In order to make the most of these benefits, you must stay active. Avoid couchlock and putting off tasks for later. While it may always be nice to get high, those who remain ‘high minded’ will be the winners of the day. Keep your focus on the big picture; getting bogged down within the swamp of minutia is likely to stall progress.

Stoner Virgos are advised to carve out specific times for meditative smoke sessions. Before you can spread optimism, you must strive to be your optimal self. There is a distinct difference between a ‘live and let live’ mentality, and simply being lazy. The obvious goal is to be part of the first mindset. Your success should not be contingent upon the actions of others. Which also means you should not worry yourself over others’ actions. Instead, when able, take the opportunity to smoke a bowl and turn the third eye inward. While the universe is sure to offer potential for prospective progress, it will be up to you, stoner Virgo, to take action. Whether it means staying a little late, or arriving to the job a little early, make the most of the situation at hand by being ready to rise to the occasion. Your diligence will ensure you are ready for that big moment when opportunity calls.

True for all stoner Virgos, personal obstacles must be conquered alone. This serves as a reminder that stoner Virgos will require solo toke time in order to prepare themselves for the demands of external forces. Bringing smoke circle acquaintances into personal situations might result in adding unnecessary fuel to the fire. Do your best to make sure you are prepared for any and all obstacles that might arise. While it can be nice to share a moment and a bowl with our fellow cannabis companions, there are times when we must rise to the occasion on our own. Be confident in your ability to overcome any, and all, adverse conditions the cosmos may bring your way. Once you have conquered the conflicts of the day, be ready to call upon your bud-loving buddies to spark one up or share a celebratory bowl for the win.

Taurus Stoner Horoscope May 2019

Stoner Taurus the planetary alignment of May will bring a stagnant chill influence to both the personal and business realm. This interesting cosmic malaise will leave you without support, but also without negative machinations. Whether the bowl is half full or empty, the stoner Taurus bull still tokes on.

Let’s look at the month of May in two halves split by the full flower moon of the 18th.

First Half:
Fuel your own engine. With stagnant universal influence, motivation and energy must come from within. Avoid all Indica strains of the sacred herb. Matching the calm of the cosmos with this chill bud could lead to your downfall stoner Taurus. The first 17 days of the period should be approached on a strict diet of Sativa greens. The calm cosmic winds provide more stable ground to stand on. This is the perfect time to strike up a small business adventure, or focus on ways to shine and climb at work. Production must come from within, but it will lead to progress. Be forewarned stoner Taurus: The first half effort must be coupled with methodical contemplation and patient execution. No rushing, especially in potentially dramatic situations. Seek allies in your quest for productive progress. Assemble a team of canna-buddies, and take down those goals.

Second Half:
This will be the optimal time to focus on the personal sphere. After the full moon, the personal sphere will become dynamic with swirling winds of change. Chill stoner Taurus, both single and partnered bulls will be able to ride these dynamic winds to positive outcomes. The stagnant universal influence will continue, but personal evaluation will come from the clear skies. Now the Indica species of the sacred herb will assist you. Sink into yourself and soar high above the terrestrial plain. Seek a high minded perspective to maneuver within the chaotic messages.

Channel your inner positive self stoner Taurus. The bowl is half full.

Sagittarius Stoner Horoscope May 2019

Stoner Sagittarius the final Spring month will bring an all encompassing shower of positive cosmic support. Dude, pretty cool right? Your mission will be to puff puff pass this shower of positivity to your fellow terrestrial astronauts.

The universe works in strange ways. Often there will be no road signs marking the path to positivity. In May, as long as you are following your own plotted path, cosmic support should light the way. However, be forewarned stoner Sagittarius: Do not attempt to predict or force this universal blessing. Remain confident in self, and simply continue down your chosen path.

The universe is also doubling down with this rain of positivity. Kinda like topping that flower bowl with a nice keif dusting. Additional cosmic support may come from cannabis companions and smoke circle canna-buddies. Yup, mingling among the hive will bring a honey pot of positivity. I sure hope your chosen path in May includes adventures with your bud loving buddies.

At work it is advised you strive to be the best. Creativity will not be required, but hard work and task mastery will see you through to progress in the work sphere. Grind hard at work so you can grind it up at home.

Stoner Sagittarius’ in a relationship may float on, everything will be alright! The single stoner Sag can expect an active period of flirtatious dating. Long term companionship may not be in the stars, but that doesn’t mean flirting can’t be fun. Get out stoner Sag, and enjoy your fellow terrestrial astronauts. Seek fun adventure with no relationship pressure.

Within the familial dynamic, be proactive with obstacles that arise. Do not put off grievances or difficult situations. A simple misunderstanding can fester into a dramatic problem if ignored. Familial problems can often disappear into a smoke cloud of a shared bowl. If the family member does not partake in the sacred herb, sometimes a solo session before confrontation can take the edge of defensive ego away. Remember stoner Sagittarius, communication and understanding is a two way dynamic. Outward messaging must also be accompanied by inward receiving.

Scorpio Stoner Horoscope May 2019

Stoner Scorpio as April showers subside, you can expect May flowers to bloom in full force. Bright solar rays of energy and encouragement will lead to an abundance of opportunities and new prospects. It could be cliche to say, but the sky’s the limit! The reality is this: Your choice to pursue such endeavors will be a determining factor in how high your successes reach. While the season is ripe for big bong rips, and roaming the terrestrial plain to your favorite smoke spots, there will be times you need to pass on the puff puff. You will be able to enjoy the best of both worlds, as long as you are able to know when to hold ‘em, and know when to roll ‘em.

The workplace should be your main focus when it comes to grinding hard. Just like in the personal sphere, your positive emanations will bring certain opportunity for career advancement. Keep a keen eye to tasks at hand stoner Scorpio. Pay attention and keep open ears to the input of coworkers. Collective efforts and persistence is sure to pay off. Whether or not your corporate cohorts are cannabis friendly, all who invest their time and efforts are sure to equally enjoy the plentiful harvest of a hard day’s work.

Get up and get out into the world stoner Scorpio! Float on and fly high among your fellow tokin’ terrestrial astronauts. Expanding your areas of exploration is sure to result in smoke circle expansion. These new canna-buddies will blend more minds to ponder the big picture, and they are certain to lead to more opportunities flexing your entrepreneurial muscles. Don’t be shy stoner Scorpio! People are sure to see your bright solar aura surrounding you, and they will be unable to resist discovering what you are all about.

All possibilities will be brought together in May. The enthusiasm you bring to each individual situation will light the way. It is likely that newfound cannabis companions could spark inspiration for a new, and lucrative side-hustle. Just remember, sharing is caring: Positive culminations from newfound cannabis-companions will come from mutual progress, not selfish gain.