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Aquarius August 2017

During this month of August, Stoner Aquarius, it will be best advised to invest your energies into the long term. Avoid unnecessary distractions, as these will only slow you down, or divert you from your original goals. It may not be a bad idea to look into acquiring some nice sticky sativas, as you will be embarking upon multiple spiritual endeavors this month, and the boosts in creativity could be helpful. The old adage, of “sharing is caring,” will be additionally important during this time. While you may feel like you are ready to take on the world, be certain to not turn down a helping hand when it is offered.

Your creativity will be a focal point during this time, as ingenuitive approaches to unexpected problems will help to smooth out results and avoid unnecessary disagreements at work. You may come to find that you are experiencing new found passions in your career life. Embrace these feelings stoner Aquarius. While they may seem foreign initially, the long term payoff will be more than worth it. If you are able to keep your professional work and your smoking work distinctly separate, then ultimately, success is a sure bet.

As summer comes to a close, you will notice a significant expansion of your inner smoking circle. These new connections may arrive in the most unexpected of places, but it will be best to embrace these new opportunities to make new friends. While you are able to offer support to those who need it, don’t hesitate to ask for help when needed. Summer may be waning, but there is still ample opportunity to make the most of the sunshine left at hand.

Cancer August 2017

Opportunity knocks in August stoner Cancer. Growth in matters of the heart and spirituality are likely during the final summer month. However, there will be little control you can place on these opportunities. August will be like a picturesque train ride through the country. You could sleep and miss the splendor or look intently at the magical creations of the universe. Don’t be afraid to take a deep dive into meditative smoke sessions during August stoner Cancer. You must be in tune with your third eye to reap the rewards of the cosmic gift placed before you. Bob Marley said, “When you smoke the herb, it reveals you to yourself.” Turn your third eye inward stoner Cancer, and see yourself. I call this introspection without intent. You are not trying to fix, adjust, or analyze anything about yourself. Witness your human and spiritual growth in real time and truly see the perception of your reality. Don’t shy away from what you see. With this insight you will be able to take the steps to nurture growth in the way you want to shape your life.

Are you passionate about your work stoner Cancer? If not you may be out of tune with your universal wave length. You must find time for your true passion to regain balance and harmony. If you are in love with what you do in the workplace, then everybody better get on board. Your efficiency and productivity will be supercharged in the final summer month. Nothing will impede your momentum.

August could be a month where love is in flux. It is most important to value yourself fully at this time. Tough decisions, or even sudden passionate decisions, are more easily decided when you are in balance with yourself and your surroundings. Cannabis companions and loved ones can’t help you with these matters that are so personal to you. Witness yourself and follow the guidance of your third eye. Flux and change can be positive for the growth of a beautiful butterfly.

Capricorn August 2017

Stoner Capricorn you may seem like a passenger in the month of August. Watching life unfold without universal blessings to impact your surroundings. This may be your fate, so it will be up to you to make the best of this situation. There is no strain or species of the sacred herb that is recommended or warned against. The one requirement is to use the sacred herb as a catalyst to understand the cosmic winds swirling around you while you hold stagnant in the calm center.

Breathe, inhale, and let it be stoner Capricorn. Meditative smoke sessions should focus more on internal strength than outward progress. Current universal struggles cannot be solved with proactive initiative. This is a time period to allow situations to develop and possibly allow problems to solve themselves. August is a great time to turn your third eye gaze inward towards yourself. What can you do to improve yourself? Your body, mind, and spirit need attention to maintain the quality of life you desire. Perhaps there are dietary changes you have been contemplating. Maybe now is the time to get back on that work out schedule. Yoga and stretching are wonderful tools to aid the body and spirit. Now is the time to find positive tasks to influence yourself stoner Capricorn.

Trust will be required in the August time period. Not trust in others, but trust in yourself and your own intuition. As you see the world unfold in front of you, all the clues and signs will be there to make the best decision for your life path. My vision implores you to go with the flow of the cosmos, but this does not mean to turn a blind eye at the situations developing. Understanding a problem sometimes can be all that is needed to solve it. Sometimes the deepest blessings in life come at you instead of from you.

Virgo August 2017

Stoner Virgo stop! Listen to “Also sprach Zarathustra” from “2001: A Space Odyssey.” This should give you the impact and necessary tone for your August reading. You see stoner Virgo, Mercury is in retrograde for you in the August time period. Perhaps a meditative smoke session with the sacred herb should take place during this reading. You see, August will present a sort of choose-your-own-adventure stoner Virgo.

Please adjust your seat into a full and upright position. Your flesh spacecraft is about to experience turbulence. Mercury retrograde will jam all communication devices. No new adventures should originate during this time period. Be alert and aware during the final summer month. Murphy is clearly in charge and you have no control. Anything that can go wrong will go wrong.

OR stoner Virgo. You can choose the adventure based in logic and reason. You see Mercury in retrograde may be a myth or a pseudoscience built on illogical coincidence and anecdotal experience. Mercury doesn’t ever move backwards! This retrograde term is based entirely on perception. Mercury’s orbit is smaller than Earth’s. And when it speeds passed Earth, it only appears to move backward. This happens about four times a year, and it is occurring now during your sign. I figured a nice logical explanation would be the perfect joint for you to smoke stoner Virgo. When you hear about the dreaded retrograde and your impending doom, please smoke about it and forget about it.

To be on the safe side, or a little paranoid, you should retrace your steps for the year. Toke time to analyze what got you to this point and where you are headed. You will find appreciation in triumphs and potentially discover missed opportunities that propelled you to this point in your astrological timeline. Avoid starting new projects, but begin planning your steps after Mercury has safely passed into another sign’s influence.

Pisces July 2017

During the ever warming month of July, Stoner Pisces, it will be greatly important that you invest the energies needed to keep yourself grounded. You can expect a lot of new experiences and encounters in both your home and work life. With this being the case, it could be quite easy to find your head in the clouds with not a care in the world. Whether it requires you to pick up the pipe less, or doing the opposite, that is, finding a strain that will promote better mental focus and increase meditations—you know best what approach will be needed.

It is recommended that you do spend some of these meditative sessions contemplating where to go next in the workplace. There will be plenty of opportunities to apply for that advancement, or work towards better wages. But, be wary of rushing towards these ends, if you’ve not given your endeavors proper planning you should not be surprised if the results are not what you had hoped. With that being said, Stoner Pisces, this is a cautionary tale, not a warning. As long as you apply your creative tendencies towards each task in front of you, you could very well be running the business in no time.

The personal realm is where you will need to be most attentive, Stoner Pisces. Those who already know you, understand that you are reliable, fun, and generous. But, it will be those persons that you newly meet that you should not neglect. If you are single, you may meet your new best bud. This could be a new significant other, or simply a new friend or partner in chronic. For, Stoner Pisces that already find themselves in relationships, just remember to be your charming self. Be confident, pack that bowl for two, and share those special moments with those whom you are fortunate to already have as part of your inner smoking circle.

Aquarius July 2017

Stoner Aquarius, you may find yourself this month with an unexpected feeling of disbelief. But, don’t worry, what you are actually experiencing is amazement at a new found peace you will discover. While at first you may not know exactly how to handle this blessing, the best advice will be to embrace it. Although it will be important to take advantage of this stage in life, it will be equally necessary to stay grounded. While others might pack a bowl or roll one up to escape for a while, you will find that the sacred herb will help remind you of your immediate surroundings. If you are able to find a balance between this time of bliss, and handling business, you can expect to experience success in all of your undertakings.

Whether you have recently started a new job, or you have been in your current career for some time, you should expect an increased confidence in your abilities to accomplish tasks before you. As you become more and more familiar with what is expected from you at work, you will show the higher-ups that your competence should not be question. Seek out and find that sweet smoking sativa, Stoner Aquarius. This will be precisely the lift you will need to keep you in the zone and clearly focused on your goals.

Towards the end of the month, Stoner Aquarius, you might feel yourself slowing down or running out of energy. You do not have to worry about this because your accomplishments will be many and noticeable. And, the good news is that you will have the support of your closest buds. If you find that your mood is lower than you want, know that you can make it higher with a little help from your friends. Whether it’s help finishing a do-it-yourself project, or help finishing a freshly packed bowl, be confident that your loved ones will have your back. Collectively, you and yours will be more than able to conquer all the wonderful surprises summer has in store.

SAGITTARIUS JUNE 2017

During this first month of summer, Stoner Sagittarius, aim high because the sky is truly the limit. Your greatest aspirations will only be surpassed by your abilities to achieve those dreams. While you begin to gain speed, know that there are no signs showing that you will have to slow down anytime soon. Precisely because you can expect to be so busy, it will be important that you make sure the task in front of you is seen through to completion before moving on to future undertakings. The only time you will be moving at a slower pace, is when you are spending time planning your next epic adventure under the sun. If you do not already have one, it is recommended that you acquire a more travel size pipe. This will come in very handy as you never know when the opportunity for an outdoor smoke session will present itself.

With all the things you will accomplish through your own efforts, consider how much more can be done if you work as part of a team. Your coworkers and business relations will be there, ready to have your back when needed. Through collaboration and hard work, you and your team will find new solutions to problems that may have been lingering from past months. Don’t be afraid to get personal. Perhaps you have new members that have joined your workforce. Be sure to offer them a friendly welcome, as this will be the first steps in growing partnerships on which all parties can rely. And, the best part is that after the day is done, the comradery can continue over a cool drink and a freshly ground bowl.

Just like in the workplace, trust, will be an important theme for you this month Sag. Trusting that the decisions you make are the right ones, and trust that you will reach the goals you set. Similarly, loved ones and friends need to know that they are welcome to share in all your new experiences. Amidst all the excitement, there may come a time when you feel like there was something else you are supposed to do. Don’t feed this anxiety too much, wind down and roll one up when appropriate. If you encounter the feeling that you’re not moving forward, that is only because you are exactly where you are supposed to be, in the company of the people you are supposed to share it with.

ARIES JUNE 2017

Stoner Aries, the first month of summer is certain to be your time to shine. You will be able to overcome even the most unexpected problems that present themselves. Sativa strains will certainly be your best option when picking your favorite varieties of the sacred herb. This will only expand and enhance your already creative tendencies. A little help to boost your critical thinking skills will serve to provide that extra brain power, so that issues that do arise will prove to be of little concern.

Your most notable progress will definitely be in the workplace. You’ve planted and cultivated your efforts during the past months–now is the time you will see the maturation of your investments. Aries, you have the particular ability to identify the areas that most need improvement. As long as you avoid making these criticisms personal, you and your peers will experience noticeable improvements in job performance. Whether you’re on the clock, or on the couch, your mind can’t help but to think of the exciting new projects you’ll encounter at work. Your rest and relaxation time should be exactly that. Whether your favorite way to medicate is your water pipe, or you prefer a good old fashion, hand rolled herbal cigarette, make sure you are getting all that you can during your leisure time. By allowing your mind to wander while enjoying your free time, you will be able to focus your energy on tasks when it is required.

Regardless of whether or not your pipe is involved, you and your closest cannabis companions can expect a pleasant time of peace to begin your summer. The long days of sunshine will provide the perfect conditions to share your favorite smoke spots with those near to you. As long as you surround yourself with good bud, and good company, you are sure to create moments that are camera worthy. June will provide the perfect opportunity to pack your bag and hit the road. Although it’s only just begun, you should prepare yourself for a long season of discovery and good times.

AQUARIUS JUNE 2017

Stoner Aquarius, just like the spring flowers blossoming beneath the summer sun, so will you too experience noticeable offshoots and new growth. These expansions of self may not always be in the area you would expect, but new undertakings and meeting new people is a guaranteed part of your future. Wherever your path leads, you will be able to maintain your relaxed, yet steady pace. That is to say, it will be nearly impossible to throw you off your groove, stoner Aquarius. While it is recommended that you take time to stop and smell the roses, maybe smoke some sacred flowers, don’t spend too much time with your head in the clouds.

Whether you are a self-employed Aquarian, or recently started in a new position, you will accomplish all of your endeavors. However, this depends on if you are able to look down the road to see the potential bumps ahead. Do this and you will quickly move from one task to the next, each being more easily accomplished and successful than that last. It will be important for you to do whatever it takes to keep the peace. Whether you are close enough with your coworkers to enjoy passing around the peace-pipe, or you maintain a more formal relationship, it will be up to you to keep the chaos at bay. As long as you are able to keep in good standing with your peers, you will be able to solve even the most unexpected challenges.

Since you will not need to worry about the realm of work, you will be able to invest most of your energies into the personal sphere. The best advice is to burn it slow, Stoner Aquarius. There will be many opportunities to enjoy some serious quality time with friends and family, so be sure that you are fully present during these moments. Keep your smoke circle small this month. This will mean everybody gets to enjoy a bit more of our favorite herb and you will know for sure that everyone in the squad will be down to ride. Although you may encounter many new faces along your travels, the most important focus should be the best buds you already have.

VIRGO JUNE 2017

Stoner Virgo the sun is out and the first summer time period of June promises to have fortunate conclusions. However, these fortunate conclusions are not based upon luck or universal blessings, they will be based on diligence and action on your part. But wait, you must also learn to relax in this storm of action. Drop the hybrid strains stoner Virgo. The month of June will require meditative smoke sessions curated with surgical precision. For example, you will be required to be active and reactive to any problems and tasks that pop up. Sativa strains of the sacred herb will be best for the majority of your smoke sessions in June. However, burnout is a serious concern with the amount of activity you will face in the first summer month. Stoner Virgo, you must take time on occasion to allow yourself a deep meditative smoke session focused on relaxation and contemplation. A deep Indica strain of the sacred herb will be useful for this. Don’t think that you can do it all with a hybrid strain or neglect either portion of my recommendation. Balance will be required to see out the results of this active time period.

The June time period will be profitable for the stoner Virgo. But this profit may not be held until a future time period. The action of June should be thought of as a foundation for the future. This is the perfect time to establish yourself in the business world. Perhaps that passionate hobby can become a business. Perhaps that idea you have contemplated is ready to develop. All of this can only be answered inside of you stoner Virgo. However, it is very important to understand that luck is not your blessing, it is action alone that can take you to higher highs.

The sphere of love and companionship will be less active in June stoner Virgo. There will be a family conflict that must be resolved, but this will be in your ability. To avoid bitter celestial head winds, do not behave with condescension or snobbery with your fellow cosmic travelers.

TAURUS JUNE 2017

Stoner Taurus the month of June is potentially dangerous. I do not see an impending wave crashing down enveloping your life like a tsunami, but it will be best to stand at attention from the beginning of June to the very end. You must demonstrate your cannabis etiquette in June stoner Taurus. Manners and unwritten rules must be followed with your cannabis companions. Mind your manners in the smoke circle. Don’t jump the line or pass a cashed bowl. Take this principle to your daily life and everything should work out well in the first summer month.

Stoner Taurus should be most on guard in the workplace. For the most part work will be profitable and efficient. However, human nature suggests that envy could get the best of others, and you could be the target. After all, who wouldn’t want a piece of that strong Taurus Bull.

Celestial stoner Taurus astronauts stuck in the capitalistic Earthly grind should mind their body in June. The skunky aroma of the sticky icky can be spotted by those you wish to conceal your herbal appreciation from. Be mindful of sweet smelling aromas from your clothes at work. You never know what opportunity stands around every corner in your community. Being mindful of your cannabreathe is important so that you can go into every surprise situation with confidence.

Independent stoner Taurus’ should get out and mingle! The stars have aligned to offer great success at meeting new cannabis companions in the first summer month. Concerts are a great way to meet interesting cosmic travelers. Catch that reggae show on the weekend!

LIBRA JUNE 2017

Stoner Libra the position of the sun in June is sure to bring action to your universal sphere. Do not allow negativity to creep into your thoughts. The action packed month of June isn’t guaranteed to be positive, but internal confidence and positivity goes a long way in influencing cosmic waves. Meditate with the sacred herb early in the June time period. Focus your third eye internally and seek confidence in your path and abilities.

When smoke clouds lift, intentions of close cannabis companions can be explored and discovered. The first summer month will bring swift action related to your smoke circle. Do not doubt yourself and your position within your circle. Approach a friendly dilemma with a friendly demeanor. Trust that any outcome can have a positive transition. Your positive attitude and brilliant insight will influence your cannabis companions.

Stoner Libra do not pick fights at work in the month of June. It should be paramount to avoid conflict in the workplace. The only thing required to keep the peace will be an attentive focus and confident resolve. Problems should take care of themselves as long as you are standing guard ready when needed.

Single stoner Libras should focus on themselves in June. Self reflection and inner understanding must first be acquired before a meaningful long lasting relationship can gain a foothold. Use the sacred herb as a catalyst for this inner dive into self awareness. Libras with partners must shower their loved one with attention and action in the first summer month. Positive and fruitful adventures will result. Find that perfect scenic smoke spot and create a lasting memory together.

LEO JUNE 2017

Stoner Leo let your roar be heard in the first month of the summer time period. June will be a month of action. Your ears must be perked. It will be important to pounce on any problems that arise. Do not leave tasks for others. An attentive lion always eats their prey, but a neglectful lion will go hungry in the night. In matters of business and work, the stoner Leo must avoid multi tasking and knock tasks down one at a time. A cluttered desk and mind will allow negative action to creep in from the sun’s powerful rays.

The sun will burn bright for the stoner Leo in June regarding cannabis companions. Action is imminent! Could it be time to leave an established smoke circle and set off on an adventure to find new cosmic cannabis travelers? Perhaps the opposite is true and the stoner Leo will blaze fresh bowls with old cannabuddies. The sun’s position implies there will be action one way or another in the month of June stoner Leo. It will be best to pack a bowl for two.

Single or married, the exposure of the sun will bring bright action to the stoner Leo in matters of love. Relax and maintain that confident composure. Puff puff breathe and let anxiety wash away. The bright action will most likely be positive and enhance your life position as long as you stay true to who you are internally and be honest with those closest to you. After all, you are a lion. King of the zodiac jungle.

GEMINI JUNE 2017

Stoner Gemini can you feel the metamorphosis happening? The first month of the summer time period will mark a significant step in your internal growth from a caterpillar to a butterfly. Take a journey with the sacred herb early in June. Travel far outside of yourself and then look back. This major life stage growth should be visible to see with your third eye. Your life cycle is laid out before you, and you are on the verge of a transition. Push your meditative smoke sessions to higher levels stoner Gemini, and see yourself for who you are and who you will become.

The universe is providing support for the stoner Gemini in June. This support cannot be taken for granted. It will be critical to be attentive and confident in tackling problems that arise. Ignoring or leaving problems for later will be punished by harsh cosmic winds. Don’t be a lazy stoner. Attentive decision making will be supported greatly by universal blessings.

The transitional month of June is also a time for second chances. Now is the time to get your resume in the right hand or start that small business you have been day dreaming about. Old failures or missed opportunities can be puff puff passed into yesterday. Now is the time to look at tomorrow.

Strike down fear and insecurity stoner Gemini. Emotional growth is built upon introspection and confidence. Do not equivocate. Move forward with strength and resolve. Transformation and growth will impact your cannabis companions, loved ones, and your family.

CAPRICORN JUNE 2017

Stoner Capricorn the first month of the summer time period will bring you as much warmth from the universe as you put into it. Blaze one up and allow your inner love and kindness to flow freely in June. You alone are responsible for your emotions and image that you project onto the world and cannabis companions. Take charge in the month of June, and lead your fellow cosmic travellers down a path to blissful enlightenment.

Take time early in the month of June to meditate with the sacred herb. Focus your meditative smoke session on prosperity and confidence. The stars are shining down on you stoner Capricorn. Now is the time to turn that hobby into a business. Perhaps a cannabusiness is what you desire. The month of June is a great time to get started. Be mindful that in order to establish something you must lead with decisive confidence. Do not allow others to steer you astray.

The same theme of leadership and confidence should be applied to your personal life. Now is the time for comfort and clarity. There are many buds on the tree stoner Capricorn. June is a great time to assess cannabis companions and smoke circles to make sure the interests of the many align with your heart and ambition. It’s not egotistical or snobby to trim the dead leaves away from the healthy plant. The current cosmic winds are kind so whatever decision you make will work out for you. Do not allow negativity or emotional recklessness derail your positive vibe.

CANCER JUNE 2017

Stoner Cancer the first month of summer will be an important time period for personal growth. Meditative smoke sessions early in the month should focus on internal confidence and trust. Trust in your inner voice and third eye vision will be tantamount to your success in June stoner Cancer. A keen alertness will be required. But not toward defense of negative situations, but an alertness toward your own intuition and perception.

Corporate warriors stuck in the grind of the machine will experience an awakening in the June time period. This awakening will be a revelation from your third eye and result in a new vision of yourself in the cogs of the mechanistic structure you find yourself trapped within. This new vision and new found understanding will mark a pivot point in your employment. Revelations like this can be overwhelming. Take a stress relieving toke of the sacred herb and contemplate what you shall do with this new found discovery.

Small business owners, stay at home parents, and the unemployed shall not have the drastic realization as their corporate brother. The June time period will be less active for them. However, be mindful of monetary decisions. Smart decisions in the first summer month can lead to a payout in the latter stages of the year. June isn’t the time to buy those Shine gold rolling papers:)

In the personal sphere of life for the stoner Cancer, life will be quite pleasant in the June time period. Cosmic winds will be at a minimum and fairly neutral. This is a great time to reacquaint and reaffirm relationships with cannabis companions. The neutral station of the universe towards the stoner Cancer means that impactful results in the form of relationships will be at a minimum. Adventures out in nature is a great way to solidify relationships with cannabis companions. #enjoy

VIRGO MAY 2017

Stoner Virgo, the sun will be shining on you in the final Spring time period. The sun does not represent fortune or an easy path stoner Virgo. It represents action and impact. Your decisions and work will definitely show results in the May time period. However, the equivocation of my words represent the dynamic nature of these results. The sunshine of May promises action, but not necessarily positive action.

Early in the month, puff puff plan with the sacred herb. It will be important to see the world from high in the clouds. With this high view with a third eye lense you will be able to see the landscape in front of you and plan for the action ahead. For entrepreneurs and workers stuck in the grind of the machine, this 10,000 foot view of the working landscape will provide more insight into how to approach problems that lay ahead. Remember stoner Virgo, action will be sure to result from your decisions in May. If the results of decisions are unclear, then maybe the problem or project should be left for a future time period. The view from high in the clouds should give you better perspective early in the month on how to proceed.

With all these words of warning stoner Virgo, understand that the sun is shining down on you. With a puff puff plan of attack and third eye vision, you will most definately see the action you desire from your efforts.

In the sphere of love and emotion, the stoner Virgo should not look for the impactful action expected in the work sphere. Understand that any negative emotional experience with family or a cannabis companion can be simply rectified with a sincere apology. Communication and patching up little squabbles is important for all parties. Single stoner Virgos must watch out for money issues with new love interests. Do not read into the relation of money or spending on the inner thoughts of a new love interest or cannabis companion.

I have a playlist song for you this month stoner Virgo. Gain confidence from the tune, T.G.I.F by Kid Cudi.

TAURUS MAY 2017

Stoner Taurus, the final Spring time period will be a positive time period, even if you may not realize it every moment. Cosmic forces have gathered to bestow upon the stoner Taurus a twinkle of luck in May. This blessing of fortune will be in relation to work and money, but at the very least it will also influence enjoyment of work and coworkers. There will also be evidence of “luck” in the stoner Taurus’ love life in the May time period, but this sprinkle of luck may not be so easily recognizable upon first glance.

Warning: Be sure to keep your cannabis activism and enjoyment separate from your work sphere in the May time period. Enjoyment of work and your coworkers will lead to a relaxed attitude. Coming together with coworkers and enjoying your work days will be a blessing, but understand the separation of work and play. There will be plenty of time to burn one down with your cannabis companions after the day of work is done.

How exciting stoner Taurus! The May time period will bring the opportunity to expand your influence and reward in the workplace. Whether you work for the man and expand your role, or work for yourself and expand your empire; expansion is the key word presented to all stoner Tauruses in May.

It is the sphere of love and companionship that becomes the most complex in May stoner Taurus. You will need the full vision of your third eye to gain patience and understanding through cloudy circumstances. Meditative smoke sessions will benefit the stoner Taurus tremendously in this regard. It will be imperative to see the unseen in matters of love and companionship. The sacred herb will help you see through the ambiguity of fake news, and understand the positivity available through truth. There may be a universal bait and switch on your plans with love and companionship. Things may not turn out in any way along the timeline or path you’ve laid out. Trust and understand that the cosmos is on your side with positivity despite any breaks in your immediate plans.

SCORPIO MAY 2017

Stoner Scorpio, the universe is about to take you on a ride. The May time period will be like that strong edible you accidentally ate too much of. Cosmic waves of emotion and experience will wash over you in May. Just when things calm to the point of understanding, the next set of waves will hit. Don’t be scared. This flurry of activity is not negative in nature or punishing in action.

Stay calm and dab on stoner Scorpio. The gates have closed, safety straps are in place, and the ride is in motion. Understanding the why’s and the how’s of this universal carnival ride is unobtainable. Relax and trust in the cosmos that everything will be allright. Whenever you find yourself contemplating the reasoning of the universe and your place on this edible roller coaster of endless crashing waves, breathe and let it be. All safety equipment is in place, so let go and enjoy the ride.

Control is not something you struggle with stoner Scorpio. Giving up control to the universe will be mandatory to surviving the twists and turns of the cosmic blessing thrown at you in the final Spring time period. In the end: Trust your environment. Trust your cannabis companions. Trust your judgement. Trust your loved ones. Trust you will come down. This trust and belief will keep you safe on the wild journey of May. Negativity will only creep in if you try to control or understand the nature of the cosmic ride. Yes stoner Scorpio, I usually encourage depth of thought and inner understanding, but in May ignorance is bliss! Meditative smoke sessions should focus on repair and rest versus contemplation and guidance.

Playlist songs have been coming to me this month. The playlist song for the stoner Scorpio in May is Float On by Modest Mouse.

SAGITTARIUS MAY 2017

Sagittarius, the seeds that you planted months ago are beginning to ripen and bear fruit. That is to say, your investments are clearly paying off. As long as you keep your focus on the final goals and do your best to maintain this level of achievement, you will be able to continue this positive momentum. Keep on and smoke strong, stoner Sag, but don’t lose sight of your ultimate goals. Whether you measure your success by monetary values or interpersonal relationships, you can expect to see continual growth. If you are willing to invest in your new undertakings the way you have into past endeavors, then there is no reason you should not experience similar success.

With regards to the workplace, Sagittarius, the best advice is to “dream big!” Don’t sell yourself short, Sag. The only person that can hold you back is you. While there will always be critics to tell you what you can’t do, it will be up to you to show them exactly what you can achieve. Regardless of how close you are to your coworkers, it is probably best to keep your success separate from your smoke circle. Sometimes, you will need to blow off steam about your work peers, and it will be best to do so with confidants that you don’t work alongside.

While you might want to share some of your positive achievements or help those around you succeed, sometimes you have to let others go it alone. You may offer your support to those close to you, but you cannot do everything for them. The best thing you can do is to be a shining example. Instead of being the one who always rolls one up, it is better to teach others how to roll on their own. This way, you can enable others to be successful without having to rely exclusively on your help.

PISCES MAY 2017

Stoner Pisces, you have much that you can accomplish, so do not fear when things do not fall in-line with your intended goals. You have spent the time looking forward to the goals you have in mind, and you will be successful in accomplishing said results. So, don’t get burdened down by the bumps in the road, or let the pessimistic thoughts distract you from your official goals. The stars are on your side and seek to advance your goals, without trying your intentions too much.

When it comes to the work environment, you have much to gain by staying the course. Your personal success, will only spill over into the workplace and your peers will only benefit from your positive example. Remember that when issues arise, that they may be self-inflicted. As long as you are able to keep the long-term as your main focus, the small things will resolve themselves. You have your own list of, ‘to-dos.’ If you are able to maintain this focus on the goals you wish to accomplish, then nothing will stand in the way of reaching success.

You may be apprehensive, Stoner Pisces, but when it comes to new endeavors, do not fear embarking into new territories. In order to maintain your current relations, little will be required. Therefore, you will have plenty of resources that will encourage new interactions and encounters. As long as you have your closest cannabis companions nearby, you will be ready to handle the unexpected surprises when they occur. You have set into motion the actions necessary to achieve your desired outcome. If you are able to maintain this focus, then you will arrive at your desired results.

LIBRA MAY 2017

Stoner Libra, the universe will test your skills at twisting and turning in the May time period. But this test falls right into your skill set to seek balance in problems and opportunities. Twist one up and burn one down stoner Libra; your skills are suited for success in the final Spring month. Meditative smoke sessions should focus on success and confidence. The stars have aligned to bless you with a fruitful month, but do not reach for the stars. The only cosmic limitations placed on your success will be the highs of your achievements.

Tasks and problems in the workplace will be no match for you stoner Libra. As you bend, twist, and turn your way through May you will feel like a magician, impressing all around you. As your confidence grows and problems are whisked away with your magic morphing skills, remember that there is a ceiling to your powers and achievements. As long as you maintain a conservative path with your efforts, you should be able to conquer all. Let’s save that half gram dab or multi gram joint for another time stoner Libra.

The same positive cosmic influence regarding situations of love and companionship will hold true in the May time period. That person you’ve had your eye on … that smoke circle you’ve wanted to join … that family member you’ve wished to come closer … all reasonable desires are possible in May stoner Libra. As long as you don’t ask too much of those around you, everything is attainable. Cosmic kush smoke signals can definitely be seen regarding the possibilities of increasing your social smoke circle. Have confidence in yourself and your socially adaptive skills stoner Libra. Add Baby I’m a Star by Prince to your playlist. This will be a great mantra or theme for the stoner Libra in May.

LEO MAY 2017

Stoner Leo, the yellow brick road will disappear in May. Though you will lose sight f the path in front of you, this does not mean you will lose direction of forward progress. Resolve and resilience must outweigh reluctance and reticence in the May time period stoner Leo. Meditative smoke sessions should focus on a deep dive into your inner self. Personal understanding and confidence will be the key to unlocking the cosmic blessing of May.

Things will not go your way in the May time period stoner Leo; at least not at first, or even second attempts. Your cannabis companions, family, and coworkers will be relying on you to get up and try try again. Inhale the magic wonder of the sacred herb. Meditative smoke breaks will allow new ideas and a new direction to form around the obstacle blocking your path. Perseverance isn’t banging your head repeatedly against a wall. It is the confidence to try again with renewed energy and effort.

The most important aspect of the May time period is confidence you will find the path once again through the cosmic fog. Be warned stoner Leo, there will be repercussions if you fall into the trap of depression and/or self pity. Know yourself and your kind selections. It may be best to stay away from deep Indica strains if you are susceptible to coping and self pity. An energetic Sativa or hybrid may be your prescription to problem solving in May.

Reluctance to form a new plan or reassess your surroundings will leave you stuck in cosmic limbo. You aren’t just fighting for yourself stoner Leo, your perseverance will impact cannabis companions, family, and coworkers. These sage words apply to both your work sphere and personal life. With confidence, attentiveness, and determination you will be able to solve any problem and leap any obstacle in your way in the final Spring month.

GEMINI MAY 2017

Stoner Gemini, your quest for higher highs will be attainable in the final Spring time period. Cosmic influences have aligned to provide your largest desires an opportunity of fulfillment. It doesn’t matter which side of your personality you choose unveil in May, there will only be one antagonist capable of keeping you from great highs. Meditative smoke sessions should focus on self confidence stoner Gemini. The largest limitation to achievement in the May time period will be the restrictions you place on yourself.

You can achieve great results in the workplace stoner Gemini. Most profits will come from plans and action you have already laid the groundwork for. Now is the time for decisive bold actions to achieve your goals. Both Gemini stoners stuck in the corporate grind, and stoner Gemini business owners can benefit from cosmic blessings in May. Self confidence and definitive action will lead you down a golden path. However, be forewarned stoner Gemini, self confidence is very different from self serving. Do not discard the thoughts or emotions of your fellow cosmic travelers or the universal blessing could flip in a negative direction.

Positive treatment of loved ones and cannabis companions will be tantamount to success in the sphere of emotion and love for the stoner Gemini in the final Spring time period. Breathe, inhale, and let it be stoner Gemini. Understanding the perspective of others will help you navigate emotional land mines that may pop up like spring flowers. As long as you feed your head with positive mantras you will keep your head with others. Empathy and sympathy will bring you closer to cosmic travelers that may not have the same universal blessings as you do in May. Take time to share a bowl with a friend and listen to their troubles, then you can share with them all of your plans to conquer the world.

CAPRICORN MAY 2017

Stoner Capricorn, the final time period of Spring will require great strength. You will not be moving mountains, actually the opposite stoner Capricorn. Internal strength will be required to plot forward despite no universal support on your side. Picture yourself in the eye of a storm. Violent movement and action swirls around you, but in the eye of the storm you are left stagnant and frozen. Long Term planning and instinctual vision will be hampered in May. These words are not an omen of destruction stoner Capricorn, but simple a guide to understanding your position in May.

Early in the May time period, curl up with a nice deep purple kush Indica. Allow yourself entertainment time with the sacred herb to better understand your position in May. Movies like Cube, Life of Pi, and Snowpiercer would be perfect for this relaxing movie night. We may all be trapped at one point in life, but in the end everything will work out.

Don’t misunderstand stoner Capricorn; the cosmos has not cursed you in the May. There are plenty of actions you can take to combat this stagnant period to progress your agenda. The most important actions focus on the short term. At work and in life, tackle the problems and tasks that are right in front of you. Knocking immediate tasks off your to do list will help prepare you for when the storm returns to life.

Meditative smoke sessions with the sacred herb are best alone in May stoner Capricorn. Your cannabis companions will not understand the universal stagnation you’ve been dropped into. By focusing on yourself, and plotting forward with an immediate to do list, you will float through May with a better understanding of your surroundings. Just like that trippy movie, at the end of the time period the sunshine of summer and the warm breath of the cosmos will bring a new light to your life.