Tag Archives: 420 life

Aries Stoner Horoscope May

Get ready stoner Aries, you’re about to make things happen!  May will begin with self-reflection and the rebirth of your determination. What will result is a sense of accomplishment felt throughout the month. Be sure to schedule regular meditative smoke sessions with the sacred herb throughout the final Spring month.  Your cannabis prescription will favor the Sativa species of our sacred plant over Indica strains.  But be forewarned:  Self-restraint will be key; overindulgence will only make things more complicated than necessary. 

My stoner Ram, the month of May will propel you into the project you’ve been seeking to finish, the job you’ve been striving to get, and the relationships you’ve been yearning to start. For significant periods you’re going to spend your time contemplating the truths and deeper meanings of all spheres of life. What’s troubling you stoner Aries? It’s high time you toke your way to relieving the struggles within you. Use the sacred herb as a catalyst to inspect and cleanse the negative energy from your being. Pick which battles to fight, and release your spirit from the ones that are not going to serve you moving forward.

Stoner Aries, you’re going to crank your body and mind into full gear during the last half of May. This means lots of long days and late nights working to get ahead of that deadline, networking to make new contacts, and seeking new opportunities to get you and your career to the next level. No smoking during business hours my stoner Ram!  And stick to bright Sativa cannabis strains to avoid couch lock. It’s time to impress, make money, and take risks. If you’ve ever wanted to switch careers, RIGHT NOW is the time to do so. Doors are opening, and getting your foot in the industry that you’ve been eyeing is a realistic possibility this month. But take caution with internal conflict.  Manage your negative side stoner Aries. You are building a new life for yourself, and you want to enter this era with ethereal patience and emotional control. 

My fiery and bold stoner Ram, don’t question yourself this month. You are enough. With the right mindset, and a stash jar filled with the sacred herb, May will bring a time of focus for your mind, and perseverance to your spirit. So go forth and change your world!

Virgo Stoner Horoscope May

Stoner Virgo, you are the kind hearted organized ally of the stoner Zodiac.  So much of your terrestrial mission is in service to others, particularly your close cannabis companions within the smoke circle.  The month of May brings with it an uncomfortable selfish breeze from the universe.  But don’t fret my analytical Virgin, the selfish breeze may create unease, but it will assist in much needed internal work that could unlock personal progress.

Now more than ever stoner Virgo, you must forgive yourself.  Use the sacred herb as a catalyst to see the impact you can have internally.  The quest for perfection, and heightened expectations, lead to disappointment with yourself.  Pack the bowl, inhale the perspective expanding nature of the sacred herb, and exhale harsh internal criticism.  The cannabis strain does not matter.  The personal mental time dedicated to the medicated meditative smoke session is the necessary step to take in May.  Make sure to toke time for solo deep dives with your sacred herbal copilot many times in the final Spring month.

Take time to create stoner Virgo.  Meditative moments with the sacred herb don’t always have to be in a dark quiet space.  Find an activity to keep your hands active while your mind can wonder and heal.  Gardening is a great activity to turn the blank canvas of soil into a living growth of nutrition.  Perhaps there are artistic endeavors or renovation projects to keep your physical body busy while you contemplate life, the universe, and everything.  Feed your head and feed your soul in May my stoner Virgin.

Make sure to tackle the task of personal growth in a safe space stoner Virgo.  After all, this month is all about you.  Once you have fully taken the internal empathetic lessons provided by the sacred herb, you will emerge on the terrestrial plane with a newfound confidence in your stride.  Heal yourself first stoner Virgo, and then you can better help others heal.  By the end of May, the smoke circle will have a refreshed attentive Virgo once again to assist them in all their smokey adventures.

Virgo Stoner Horoscope April

Cosmic vibes in April favor the natural traits of the stoner Virgo.  Ah yes my helpful Virgin, it will be nice to have a cosmic breeze at your back while you traverse the terrestrial plane.  But this warm influence will amplify all of your stonerific qualities, maybe even the ones that can cause friction with your canna-crew.

Organization and analytical analysis will be supported by a bright cosmic breeze this month.  This means toke it out, and plan it out.  Any stuck gears in the sphere of economics can be loosened in April.  There is a solution or an escape from any problem or obstacle.  Medicated meditations with the sacred herb can assist in all problem solving missions.  This month is a great time to combine your analytical mind with herbal enhancements to solving economic issues.

The Kinks said it best in 1981 stoner Virgo, “Paranoia the destroyer.”  Don’t destroy yourself this month with an overactive analytical brain.  The cosmic blessing in April is simply an amplification of your own stoner traits.  So that overactive brain will be more troublesome within the personal sphere this month.  Use the sacred herb as a catalyst to find perspective instead of a tool to descend into a paranoid rabbit hole.  Stock some CBD flower on hand to mix in if an overactive brain brings unwanted anxiety.

Chill stoner Virgo.  Select some Indica dominant cannabis hybrids for the stash jar this month.  Mid month you will notice a manic surge of energy from the cosmos.  All those ideas and plans will be wonderful to brainstorm and execute.  Everything might seem a bit brighter.  BUT, there are many stoner traits among the stoner Zodiac.  Not every stoner star sign will be feeling your natural burst of energy, and bright enthusiasm.  So chill stoner Virgo.  Even in those manic moments of great ambition, toke time to relax.  Use the sacred herb as a catalyst to find understanding, empathy, and patience with your cannabis companions.

This is a powerful month for you stoner Virgo.  Much progress can be made on the terrestrial plane.  But as you fly close to the Sun of energetic ambitions, don’t burn the wings of your partners in chronic.  With the sacred herb as your copilot, you should be able to navigate your high flying travels safely with the smoke circle still intact.

Taurus Stoner Horoscope April

Stoner Taurus you are just fine watching the other signs of the stoner Zodiac welcome Spring with a sprint toward Summer in mind. You, however, would be more than happy to spend the month meandering towards May, to take the scenic route whenever possible, and never settling on a specific timeline for arrival. While it definitely can be nice to stop to smell the bud, and smoke the flower, eventually you will have to get back to the grind.  My blissful Bull, if you wander for too long, you will reach the end of April wondering why you didn’t get more done!  You must take mindful action this month to prevent going nowhere fast.  Make a schedule for meditative sessions with the sacred herb, and make sure you stick to it. These moments of marijuana musings and self reflection will help break the monotony of the day to day, and will also help you refocus your attention on the things that really matter.

Stoner Taurus, work is not likely to be overly exciting this month. Unfortunately, as tedious as it may feel, there will still be plenty of to-dos that still must get done. But, if you do find yourself staring out the window while working, daydreaming of the great outdoors instead of focusing on the task at hand, stop imagining and get outside!  At first this might sound counterintuitive stoner Taurus, but if you’re not making progress on a project anyway, it might be more useful to just go ahead and take a break. Light one up beneath the bright Spring sun, inhale the inspiration all around you, and exhale any lingering tension.  A renewed sense of calm may also come with a reinvigorated determination and confidence to get back to taking care of business.

By the middle of the month, you will transition from just dreaming about where you want to go, to blazing trails and taking tokes in lands both near and far. Stoner Taurus, you might decide to turn off your phone, and unplug to escape the trappings of society. But, you also can’t deny that company would be nice on your terrestrial travels. Afterall, two bowls are better than one, and they are even nicer if you have someone to share them with!  

Scorpio Stoner Horoscope April

Stoner Scorpio it’s time to take a break, or at least step away from your recent obsession.  Celestial bodies have aligned in April to provide a much needed escape hatch from your passionate grind.  The second Spring month will be a time to cherish the accomplishments of your physical endeavors while refocusing on internal growth.

Physical projects give way in April to mental healing.  You have been a busy Scorpion the last few months primming and primping everything around you. But the cosmic influence of April supports taking a break from the go-go lifestyle you have created.  I hear you stoner Scorpio, “What if there is still so much to do?”  We are all the masters of our own decisions, but if you burn that one extra bowl, you might get overcooked. Seek balance my productive Scorpio.  There is no premonition of a stagnant period, but at some point you have to turn the volume of the physical world down so you can hear your inner voice speak.  Turn your power to manifest in the physical realm into a focus on self care.  How many impending deadlines do you create from your own internal pressure?  Find Sublime more in life in April, “I smoke two joints in the morning, I smoke two joints at night.  I smoke two joints in the afternoon, it makes me feel alright.”  Balance stoner Scorpio.  You can still operate with efficiency in the terrestrial world, but now is the time to pencil in that smoke filled siesta into your calendar.

Don’t forget to get out stoner Scorpio!  So much work on your physical space recently, toke time to enjoy the majesty of our terrestrial world.  If a partner-in-chronic calls you out, join them!  Time away from your personal space with nature, some good green, and your best buds, might be the expedition that recharges the mental batteries, and opens your third eye to new perspectives.  

All of these prescribed breaks from the physical space you’ve focused on so much recently sets up an important end to April.  The Full Moon of the 26th may cause stress and insecurity within your canna-fam.  But you, stoner Scorpio, with your intuitive nature, and freshly recharged cosmic spacesuit, will be able to assist your cannabis companions through a potentially chaotic time.  Perhaps all that personal time in April fortifying your cosmic life boat will lift you, and your canna-fam, to safety as you steer toward progress in the next period.

Sagittarius Stoner Horoscope April

Stoner Sagittarius this month you can light up and leave your worries behind. April will be nothing but smooth hits and smoke filled days. The temperature is slowly going up, and so are your positive vibrations. Hit the road and share these good vibes with all your fellow tokin’ terrestrial astronauts whose path you cross. Whether you take a long weekend with the ganja gang, embarking upon an epic endo-excursion to yet undiscovered destinations, or a simple day trip to your favorite smoke spot, travel is a must this month!

Stoner Sag, you can expect work to be equally productive and prosperous during this season. You may find yourself enjoying the daily grind more than usual. The first weeks of the month will be a period of great creativity and high aspirations. If you channel this extra energy in the early days, you will be able to maintain this momentum throughout all of April. My accurate Archer, inspiration can strike at any time, not just during the nine to five. Keep a note taking device at the ready. Sharing some fresh ground greens with the canna-fam can be a great way to unwind in the evenings. But, it can also be a way to free your mind; a time to allow yourself to explore abstract trains of thought. What might start out as late night hazy conceptualizations, can become tangible, serious, and measurable results … as long as you’re able to remember the insight you had in the morning.

Stoner Sagittarius you pride yourself on being an independent, do-it-yourself kind of person. But don’t let your stubbornness cause you to miss opportunities to make new connections or collaborations with your partners in chronic. After a long Winter of mostly solo smoke sessions and selfcare, now is the time to rekindle old friendships, and get back to packing your bowls for two. You can still toke time to roll one up for just you, but the more moments you spend puff, puff and passing to a friend, the higher your spirit will rise. While travel plans should definitely be included in your April itinerary, don’t underestimate a good old fashion movie or game night with your favorite cannabis companions in your own cozy abode. Find your balance stoner Sagittarius:  You want to stay active and outdoors when the weather permits, but also slow your roll when needed so you don’t burn yourself out before Summer is in full blaze.

Pisces Stoner Horoscope April

Stoner Pisces, a slow burn is not always a bad thing. While it is true the cosmos has no epic episodes planned for you this month, the silver lining is that you also don’t have to worry about any chaotic or unexpected setbacks either. You can look at an uneventful April as boring, like you’re going nowhere fast, or you can embrace your inner chill, and enjoy the start of Spring as a peaceful rejuvenating period. My swift Fish, it’s up to you to decide if the stash jar is half empty or half full? Remember, it’s all a matter of perspective. It is understandable that you could get a little restless during this time, and feel like you need to mix things up. Just don’t be brash stoner Pisces. Any meaningful changes should be well considered and intentional. It’s better to pause, puff, and contemplate beforehand, rather than to rush ahead and regret later. Before you manifest, meditate! 

You know the grind never truly ends stoner Pisces. This month is no different; except you can expect greater returns simply by maintaining your usual diligent and consistent pace. However, don’t take this prospective come-up as a guarantee or a reason to slack off. The higher ups at the office will definitely notice decreased quality of work if you decide to cut corners. But, you can also impress them by burning through the daily tasks, and show them you’re ready for the next level. Increasing your earnings is not the only way to stack and save your green stoner Pisces. Instead of dining out, maybe try replicating your favorite restaurant eats at home; or start buying your cannabis an ounce or half ounce at a time versus those spendy little packages. Little things can make a big difference, and will add up over time. And with your additional savings, you won’t have to feel bad when you splurge, and treat yourself to those top shelf buds.

Stoner Pisces a garden doesn’t grow any faster if you’re watching it. So make your plans, then light one up, and relax. Let the seeds you plant now, bloom in their own time. If you’re really worried about not getting enough done, time recreating, and tokin’ it up with your cannabis companions, is always time well spent. A lowkey smoke session might not be the most exciting, but they can be meaningful. For now stoner Pisces, focus on the nearby:  Friends, family and spreading those good vibes. Before you know it, Summer will be in full swing, and your calendar filled with an abundance of stoney adventures.

Libra Stoner Horoscope April

Stoner Libra, as we welcome the first full month of Spring, people are planting their gardens, getting their spring cleaning done, and growing excited about the warmer days ahead. And as the days grow longer, the sun isn’t the only thing that will be spreading light. Stoner Libra, your strong, yet kind aura will brighten the moods of all of the terrestrial travelers you encounter. Your current partners in chronic will want to be around you more, and you are sure to capture the gaze of complete strangers who won’t be able to resist their undeniable urge to get to know you. This season, you will be the living embodiment of sharing is caring: Your time, your smile, and of course your sticky top shelf nugs!  But, you’ll want to keep your sensimilla selection strictly to the Sativa cannabis species this month. You have a fully booked social calendar ahead, and you want to keep energy levels high so you don’t have to reschedule plans due to couch lock. 

Stoner Libra, your listening skills and your ability to see issues from diverse perspectives will be essential in maintaining a peaceful environment in the workplace. You won’t be able to prevent conflicts between your peers, but you will certainly play a crucial role in resolving confrontations when they do arise. If sharing a bowl is an option, then light up the peace pipe to help lower the tension in the room. Getting everyone vibing on a similar wavelength will not immediately fix things, but it’s a good start toward resolution. And if the team can’t toke it up, it’ll still be important to talk it out. Because harsh feelings don’t only affect the people directly involved, but can bring down the rest of the team too. Stoner Libra, address disagreements early so that everyone is on the same page; otherwise productivity will be slowed throughout the month.

At the end of the month you transition from a stoney social butterfly to cocooning yourself at home for some much needed rest and relaxation. This will be a time to turn your attention and kindness inward stoner Libra. While you would share the last of your nugs with almost anyone in need, sometimes we have to remind ourselves that like our stash jar, our emotional resources are not endless. Focus on your needs and those of your most inner smoke circle. Whether it is with your one and only cannabis companion, or your closest pot-loving platonic partner-in-chronic, use this pause in the last days of April to plan an exciting ganja getaway for the coming month.

Leo Stoner Horoscope April

The natural habitat for the stoner Lion is out on the terrestrial plane leading the pack.  This month your charm and enthusiasm will be best focused internally.  Although this may seem like a negative premonition due to your natural state of being, it is very much in concert for the Zodiac leadership of the stoner Lion.

Think of it this way stoner Leo:  Smoke circle expansion is not in perpetual motion.  To be the hearty Lion you must take care of yourself.  There will always be periods of consolidation to strengthen the foundation of the canna-fam.  April is one of those periods.  

First, stoner Leo, are there any lingering problems or obstacles left over from the March period?  You will see universal support for solving these nagging issues in the second Spring month.  Toke time to self in the first decade of April.  A solo smoke session will be illuminating.  Use the sacred herb as a catalyst to confront the obstacle or problem.  Our sacred green goddess has a way of unveiling new pathways to success.  Perhaps you just needed to quiet down the noise, and seek all the answers from within.

Second, after the New Moon of the 11th, you may appreciate time to yourself to pursue learned endeavors.  The cosmos is sending a warm breeze of inspiration to sharpen your wise wit stoner Leo.  Our great ganja goddess has a way of showing us broad perspectives.  Perhaps you will see with an enhanced third eye vision that a personal mission to learn a new skill, or research an interesting topic, isn’t selfish, but necessary!  Use our cannabis spiritual guide to sink deep into that subject, topic, or activity, that will push you toward being a better you.  Do this for yourself, and in the end it will prove to be in the service to others.

Finally stoner Leo, the month ends on a sharp note.  Be weary of the Full Moon on the 26th.  All this internal attention during the month might cap resentment and anger toward a frenemy or smoke circle acquaintance.  Pressure will build behind the restrained damn.  Blow O’s instead of your top stoner Leo.  If you release the pressure in the wrong way it could dampen the results of a great month of internal work.

Gemini Stoner Horoscope April

Get out among the broader smoke circle stoner Gemini!  Universal influence in April supports a social Twin.  That’s right, guard your eyes and step out of your home and comfort zone.  That’s the Sun that is blinding you, and it comes with energy and adventure.

But there is a danger in this expansive motive for April.  Adventure on the terrestrial plane is not an all-you-can-smoke buffet.  At times during the month, you may want to do it all, and do it now!  However, the bountiful opportunities must be sifted with a keen third eye.  That do-it-all mentality will certainly burn more than just bowls if it is not tempered with common sense and thoughtful planning.

Sometimes the cosmic influence beamed in from our ruling celestial bodies counterbalances stumbling blocks built into our nature.  And sometimes we need a little guidance to make the best of our cosmic opportunities.  This month could be a little tricky for the stoner Gemini at home.  Make sure the sacred stash jar is loaded with the two opposing cannabis species.  Energy, fun, excitement, and adventure out and about on the terrestrial plane will certainly be complimented by the Sativa species.  However, in those in-between moments, you must find your chill and calm with the Indica species.  Those within your canna-fam may not appreciate you bouncing off the walls as you anticipate the next stoney adventure around the corner.  Find your inner chill in those stagnant moments waiting for the next trip, and unleash your bright energy when you finally get to those anticipated moments.

Finally stoner Gemini, I have a helpful tool that will assist you in all facets of the second Spring month.  It’s time to take up journaling!  Not only will you be able to document the grand adventures of April, hunting secret smoke spots with your best buds, but it will also give you something to submerge yourself into during those chill idle moments at home.  Perhaps this new habit of journaling will lead to progressive breakthroughs for yourself, and perhaps it will help you recount your stoney adventures to future smoke circles.  No matter the result, I’m sure you will have plenty to fill those pages!