Tag Archives: 420 life

Virgo Stoner Horoscope August

Stoner Virgo the month of August will be similar to that time you hit the pipe, or joint, one time too many in one session.  Crashing waves of stoned paranoia followed by troughs of paralyzing deep contemplative thoughts all leaving you beached on an island within yourself.  

We’ve all been there, my logical Virgin.  The great news is that you survived that face melting stoned psychedelic experience, and perhaps you even learned valuable lessons from it.  August will be similar.  

On the final day of July cosmic machinations from solar system events threw the stoner Virgo into a new state of mind.  This event may be so impactful that the nature of how you see yourself, and the world, could be dramatically changed.  

Rusty Eric wisely said, “When you allow your ego to control your thoughts, everything you believe becomes an illusion.”  

Stoner Virgo, the key to progress in August will be to survive and thrive within the deep cosmic waves in the first half of the month.  Then find an adaptive plan in the second.  All the while your stout work ethic, and logical brain, will guide you through all phases.  

The cannabis prescription for this mind melting month is a bit loose.  Each stoner Virgo must make their own decisions at appropriate times regarding the sacred herb.  Absolutely stock a high CBD low THC cannabis strain in your stash box for the month.  Especially for the first decade.  

The universe will be sending enough waves of deep contemplation.  You will want your cannabis copilot to assist in dealing with your thoughts, versus accentuating them.  

Stock your favorite Sativa strains for the second half of the month.  The creativity of the Sativa species may assist in the adaptive cosmic notes of the final two weeks. 

Know this my stoner Virgin:  As with that moment you got too high, and everything was uneasy and confusing, you were ok.  When your worldview is challenged in August, remember, everything is going to be ok.

Taurus Stoner Horoscope August

Stoner Taurus August will be an emotional period.  All of the human condition will be felt on the terrestrial journey through the final Summer month.

In the first two weeks of August, lean heavy on the sacred connection provided by cannabis.  Universal influence will support digging deep into the roots of your familial bonds.  Toke time to medicate and meditate on the events and moments that brought you to this stage in your terrestrial adventure.

Join the smoke circle stoner Taurus.  Chop it up, and chat it up with your canna-fam.  Open communication will be the key to this heartfelt period.  The pressure of this weighty world has been capped recently.  Use communal smoke sessions to release the pressure.  

Cannabis companions, and the broader smoke circle are ready to listen.  Sharing a story or two while sharing a blunt can be a very cathartic experience my stoner Bull.

Speaking of blowing off steam while blowing smoke clouds.  After a thoughtful beginning to August, the final two weeks will be filled with cosmic adventure.  Restlessness will give way to ambition.  

But, be cautious stoner Taurus.  There are plenty of fun adventures to be found within the rules and structures of society.  Without restraint and maturity, stepping outside these rigid rules may cause costly unintended impacts.

Suck it up buttercup!  Stoner Taurus, this cute phrase does more than rhyme.  It is a call to action from within.  Toke time for mindful meditations with the sacred herb in August.  Deep medicated dives are not necessary, but numerous moments of contemplation are required.  

The universe will send positive waves of resiliency your way, but you must bathe in the blessings.  It’s easy to catch the feels over slights and missed opportunities.  It’s easy to wallow about budgetary constraints leaving you on the outside looking in on what you consider to be the finer things on this terrestrial plane.  

Use contemplative moments with the sacred herb to see through the frivolity of material emotions.  Use your cannabis copilot to train yourself to see beyond the trappings of envy and victimhood.  By the end of August, the stoner Bull will be ready to charge forward with ambition and confidence.  But now with emotional experience and strategy guiding their powerful gallop.

Scorpio Stoner Horoscope August

Stoner Scorpio, who said the Summer season was all about lounging in the solar rays?  Not you, not this August!  No need to prepare for an ambitious final Summer month, you already know what is coming.

And it comes fast stoner Scorpio.  Universal influence will make an immediate impact in the first days of August as all your hard work recently will transition to project completion and professional development.

Be mindful my stoner Scorpion.  Use the sacred herb to enhance your third eye vision toward your ambitious options.  Use your keen canna-eyesight to analyze the available projects and your valuable time resource.  The key to August will be to embrace the ambitious celestial influence with confidence, but also with conservative logic.

Stoner Scorpio, your spirit animal will morph into a work horse with an abundance of options on the terrestrial plane.  But this cosmic blessing is also a hidden trap.  

You may want to walk or run down all the trails in front of you.  Take on every challenge available.  The universe will provide a brisk wind to power your ambitious sails, but this very same positive influence could be a trap door for negativity.  

Gluttony of ambition could leave you bloated and overwhelmed once the music stops.

This is where your cannabis prescription for August will play a key role.  Toke time to meditate with the sacred herb to lay out a cost benefit analysis of the potential projects and the available time resource each will consume.

Stoner Scorpio, pack bowls of high CBD cannabis for the ambitious work day.  Hold stash jar reserves of the Indica species for the evening unwind.  Your daily routine will follow this formula:  Grind – Appreciate – Repeat.  

Reflective appreciation for life, and what you have built, will be a necessary step to maintain the momentum of ambitious progress.  These medicated meditative moments of pause in between task mastery will also assist with relationships within the smoke circle.

The New Moon of the 8th marks an important window of clarity within the cosmic hustle and bustle of August.  It is impossible to move past errors, mistakes, and transgressions without acknowledging them stoner Scorpio.  The cosmos will offer insight and progress with the passing of the New Moon on the 8th.  But it will be up to you to inhale the magic of the sacred herb, and turn your third eye gaze inward.  Self analysis is never easy, but the breakthroughs last a lifetime.

Sagittarius Stoner Horoscope August

Stoner Sagittarius August will be a month of contemplation and great progress; so long as you toke the time to make it so.  So long as you stay within your protected boundaries of the smoke circle, all campaigns will be met with swift victory!

The stoner Archer is a master strategist, and firm in their faith.  Cosmic winds of enlightenment will offer an opportunity to readdress long-held beliefs, and reassess the internal underpinnings of their terrestrial strategy.  

The choice is yours stoner Sag.  There will be no fateful consequence within failure to act, but possible great rewards to those that take the plunge.  Your great green cannabis copilot will be with you this month to guide your inquisition.  

A balanced hybrid cannabis strain is recommended throughout the final Summer month.  Deep medicated dives with the sacred herb will not be as important as consistent balanced smoke sessions.  Use the sacred herb to elevate your broad vision.

Now hear this stoner Sagittarius:  This learned quest is not about the answer.  It is about the question.

The universal influence in August will present great strength in research and learning.  But the true blessing will be in the questions that challenge your vision of the terrestrial landscape.  As long as you are asking the right questions, your cannabis copilot will guide you to new angles and perspectives.  Thus, you will be able to see the problems and solutions from a different vantage point.  New information, new guidance, and possible new strategies will culminate from this inquiry.  

Please be careful stoner Sag.  All you need is within you and your current smoke circle.  This learned strategic adventure is not about new cannabis sources or human intel.  By the end of August, new appreciation will develop for your fellow tokin terrestrial astronauts.  Deeper bonds within the canna-fam will strengthen.  

Challenge yourself stoner Sag, progress is within you, as long as you ask the right questions.  No pressure.

Leo Stoner Horoscope August

Stoner Leo let’s get lit in August!  Universal influence will be beaming with sunny rays that accentuate the traits of the stoner Lion.  As long as you mind your self reflection, expansive progress and smokin good times are assured in the final Summer month.

The leader of the stoner Zodiac must be confident and certain.  However, the confident stoner Lion can come off as arrogant in their certainty. They can seem conceited in application of their knowledge.  

Toke time with your sacred cannabis copilot throughout August. The cannabis strain does not matter this month.  The depth of your medicated meditations does not matter this month.  What matters most is the honesty and visibility you place within yourself.  Bob Marley once said famously, “When you smoke the herb, it reveals you to yourself.”  

As you travel through the August time period, fun loving conversations, interesting inquiry, and intelligent debate will be essential to the progress of the month.  But, honest self reflection will be key to harmony within the smoke circle.

Stoner Leo, it’s your birthday, let’s party!  This will truly be a blessed period for the rambunctious Lion.  Passing joints and matching bowls won’t be a problem at the smoke circle this month.  

As your sign transits through your neighbor Virgo’s influence, you might pick up some helpful budgeting tips, and conservative money traits.  Nobody regrets responsible partying in future time periods stoner Leo.  The universe and your cannabis copilot should help you avoid running up debt to fund exciting endo-excursions.

Holy cow stoner Leo!  How do you lead the stoner Zodiac all over this terrestrial plane?  It must be exhausting!

In August there will be waves of intelligent design sent your way.  These cosmic waves could boost your ability to lighten the load of the canna-crew through delegation.  You have been contemplating ways to ease your burden stoner Leo.  

Toke time to meditate throughout the month with our green goddess of inspiration.  Our friendly female sensimilla can help you manifest the creativity to develop new ways to lighten the load of leadership.

Careful though stoner Leo.  We spoke earlier about the ability to monitor one’s communication and hubris.  All of the blessings of August come with the need to monitor yourself in a mirror.  Puff the sacred herb, and remote view yourself with an empathetic eye.  

Your internal drives, buoyant bubbly nature, and the sunny influence from the cosmos, will all combine to create a month to remember.  But it’s the kindness and compassionate self critique embedded in the daily cannabis affirmations that will push your success into progress.

Push positivity stoner Leo.

Aries Stoner Horoscope August

Stoner Aries, you’ve been blazing hot and fast since the Summer season started.  So you don’t have to feel like you’re missing out if you decide to slow your roll, and coast into the cooler days of Fall. 

Of course, you don’t want to completely burn out, and spend the whole month in a perpetual state of couch-lock.  But know this my restful Ram:  It’s okay if your calendar isn’t filled to the fullest every minute of the day.

August should be a season of refreshing R&R:  roasting and relaxation. Stoner Aries, be sure to toke plenty of time to stop to smell, and smoke, the flowers. You won’t have to travel far to discover scenic smoke spots, and serenity can be found in your own backyard. 

Whether you set out by yourself for a solo stoney stroll in nearby nature, or venture out and about with a few cannabis companions.  You will see your familiar stomping grounds in a new light this month. 

There is inspiration to be found all around you stoner Aries.  You just have to remember to look.

Work will be equally peaceful and productive in the final Summer month. But this is one area of life you don’t want to turn on auto-pilot. As long as you keep your time for play and productivity separate, you will be able to quickly check off most tasks on your to-do list without breaking a sweat.

Stoner Aries, because you make it look so easy, it shouldn’t come as a surprise if some of your coworkers become suspicious of how much you are able to achieve. Let them waste time criticizing if that’s what they need to do.  You have projects to tackle, and work to get done.

Just be mindful that you don’t let your successes go to your head. Instead of responding to their jealousy, try to inspire them to push onward and upward, to reach the lifted frequency you are operating on this month.

Most of all stoner Aries, you should spend the last weeks of Summer tokin’ and talkin’ with the cannabis companions you care for the most. The universe has nothing but high times, and good vibes planned for you this August. As long as you surround yourself with good company, and the greenest ganja, you will make the summer of 2021 the highest, and happiest, it can be.

Taurus Stoner Horoscope May

Stoner Taurus of all the stoner star signs, you will have the greenest thumb this month. Whatever you touch will flourish, and everyone you encounter will leave with peace in their hearts and good buds in their pipes! Some might be skeptical of your vibrant optimism, thinking that you are just looking at the world through green-colored glasses. But you can’t help but to see the stash jar as half full. Stoner Taurus, it is precisely your natural ability to see the greatest potential in almost everything; this will inspire and elevate all those who get to call you their cannabis companion. 

Stoner Taurus, there are those who are only able to see the seed, small and seemingly insignificant. With your third-eye sight, you can envision the beautiful and bountiful garden it will become. While you are never one to be afraid to get your hands dirty, or do whatever is needed to get the job done, during this period you will make a bigger impact by focusing on the planning phases of projects. My patient Bull, let others worry about implementation while you focus on the big picture. Spend time with stimulating Sativa cannabis strains during your brainstorming sessions. Now is the time to let your imagination fly freely, and embrace all things creative. You never know when inspiration will hit you.  What begins as a half-baked idea during a smokey night with the sacred herb, may just be the spark that manifests tomorrow’s next big innovations. 

Be cautious stoner Taurus.  Some of your closest cannabis companions are heading toward a time of tumultuous celestial commotion. While you can’t prevent karma from taking its course, you can be a stoney oasis amidst the cosmic chaos.  Be the calm, cannabis-friendly center in the eye of the storm. When you see those near you are going through something heavy, sometimes the best thing you can do is to pack a bowl, light it up, and listen. As the month goes on, the smoke will clear, and your partners in chronic will be back to their vibrant and lively selves. But, until then, your bright aura will serve as a guiding light through the hazy days ahead.

Scorpio Stoner Horoscope May

Do you like rollercoasters stoner Scorpio?  Of course you do my brave Scorpion.  Well buckle up, because the month of May is destined to be a thrill ride with many ups and downs.

One of the deepest and most impactful cosmic influences of the final Spring month will be felt internally.  As you travel through May, you will shed complex layers of emotional and spiritual understanding.  Each layer peeled will be like a rebirth of perception within our terrestrial existence.  Heavy stuff right?  The cosmic trick to this period will be the unexpected nature and frequency of these personal epiphanies.  I recommend flexibility within your schedule so that deep dives with the sacred herb can be accommodated at the right moments.  

Stoner Scorpio, stock the stash jar with two cannabis varieties this month.  First, a deep Indica strain that can assist you in slowing down the world to find deeper connection with self.  Granddaddy Purple or Bubba Kush should do nicely.  This sacred herbal tool should be used in meditative moments when the universal rollercoaster is ratcheting higher and higher with increased tension.  It is in these moments when you must face the terrestrial fear of the outside world, and connect with your inner voice for guidance.  Second, keep a balanced hybrid cannabis strain like Blue Dream or Sherbert as your daily driver.  You need to balance my swift Scorpion!  After you’ve faced your fears, and communicated with your inner self, you will need sure feet, and a calm head, to practice and enact your new understanding among your fellow terrestrial astronauts.

Progress and growth are the key drivers to the celestial influence of May.  But instead of a helpless passenger, you will be driving the change.  The rollercoaster is a great metaphor for May; but maybe instead of placing yourself in the cart for this analogy, you should manifest yourself as the carnival conductor.  You are the master of this ride stoner Scorpio.  

Sagittarius Stoner Horoscope May

Stoner Sagittarius the period of May will delight the tension in your bow.  My curious Archer always on a quest for truth and reason, perhaps this month you shall hit your mark with precision.  Make sure your quiver is loaded with a balanced hybrid cannabis strain.  The key to this month will be feeding the natural curiosity with an enhanced third eye, while maintaining the energy and enthusiasm to fulfill your quest.

Toke time to chill stoner Sag.  The largest warning for May will be to avoid charging the gates without a plan.  The universal influence this month will provide a wind at your back, but don’t over shoot your shot!  Your natural abilities will be heightened.  Toke time to chill with the contemplative magic of the sacred herb to gain an enhanced perspective before jumping all-in on an attack.  Much like herb filled bowls, there will be plenty of targets in May.  Steady your movements to smoke them all.

There is another magical influence from the cosmos in the final Spring month that will act like a kief dusting on the bowl of life.  Your inquisitive nature will be buoyed by the celestial alignment.  This is a time of learned endeavors and expansive ideas.  Don’t go solo on your terrestrial mission in May.  Pack a bowl for two, and pack the stash jar with enough to share.  The key to unlocking the philosophical and creative experiences this month will be communication and companionship.  What could be better than chopping it up with the canna-crew while burning bowls?  This type of situation could lead to that big “ah ha” moment you have been seeking.

Good luck on your adventure stoner Sag!  Don’t get lost in one particular part of the mission.  Each step has its own unique opportunity.  Puff the plan.  Smoke the execution.  Load the bowl for the troops.  You will come out of May an advanced Archer of the highest degree.

Pisces Stoner Horoscope May

Stoner Pisces this month you find yourself in the heart of Spring, the quintessential season of transformation and growth. For you, it is also an ideal time for outside exploration, and inward examination. When you look in the mirror, what do you see? Or, a better question is, what do you want to see? Stoner Pisces, your potential for growth and self-discovery will be limited only by your own imagination and willingness to follow your dreams. Self-care is more than just a feel good buzz word, it is the seed from which all other positivity sprouts. You are known for being attentive and considerate of others’ needs and feelings, but it’s hard to help others find their footing if you’re not first grooving yourself. There’s nothing wrong with stepping away from the smoke circle to pack a bowl for one, toke time alone to relax, find your center, and realize your own inner peace.  Then you can rejoin the group with enough good vibes to go around. 

While this will be an important and prosperous period for you stoner Pisces, try not to take yourself too seriously. In the workplace you have the chance to be equally constructive and creative. It’s okay to let your imaginative left brain take the lead, as long as you let your logical right brain take over when it’s time to implement plans into action. With this in mind, you should be a little more selective with your cannabis strains in May. Try to stick to a stimulating sensimilla; something that will stoke creative fires, and lift your spirit to higher levels of consciousness. If you’re overwhelmed with just how many different strains are available these days, simple classics like Super Sour Diesel or AK-47 are always a good choice. Although your nights will be hazy, you will start each day with a clear and refreshed mind, ready to tackle whatever the workday might bring!

Stoner Pisces, the skies are clear, the sun is shining, and the open road is calling your name. If you play your cards right, you will travel many miles on endo-excursions to destinations both near and far. The key to a successful road trip season is to make solid plans. Now is not the time to grab the pipe and go, but instead toke time to load up an inspired plan. Stoner Pisces, with good friends by your side, and kind buds in your pipe, you can be certain that the journey this Spring will always be as memorable as the destination.