Gemini

The Stoner Gemini is a witty twin. Cosmic influences are subject to change with different cannabis strains chosen.

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Gemini March 2016

Along with the change of the season, March will mark a time of new beginnings for you, stoner Gemini.  You will find your primary focus on your life status, how you feel about yourself, and how you are viewed by others.  You will experience a wave of positive energy that will allow you to make the necessary changes to spring yourself into action.  The past few months have been a little rough, but consider March as your clean slate.  Like I said, new beginnings:  Your future starts today.

This month, don’t talk about it, be about it.  Now is the time to start being the person you’re always saying you want to be and start doing the things you always say you’re going to do.  The only person holding you back is you.  Maybe you’ve been dreaming about getting involved in your local government to finally get your opinions heard.  Or, perhaps you’ve been wanting to start daily meditations to get that intrapersonal reflection time you crave, but can never seem to find the time.  It could even be something as small as finally cleaning your dab rig every week like you say you will, but instead let your lungs suffer for weeks on end.  You will find great satisfaction out of helping yourself and others, and your confidence levels will soar with each accomplishment and small step made towards a better you.  Just like Michael told us: “If you want to make the world a better place, take a look at yourself and then make a change.”

Toke lightly this month.  Now is not the time to get stuck in a couch-lock.  Save the dabs for the weekends, and puff on a light Sativa during the day.  A little shazzy reggae dub during the work day is sure to keep the energy levels bumping.  Your creative juices are flowing this month, and you will find great satisfaction if you are able to find an outlet for it.  Take risks and dare to go where no Gemini has ever gone before.  😉

Gemini January 2016

Well, Stoner Gemini, you made it!  For you, January 2016 is about tying up loose ends and completing old tasks, so that you can continue forward to more personal and professional successes.  Now is the time to analyze your past to make way for a better future; review your present objectives and set new targets.

Your career has suffered a bit the last few months as you have blindly wondered about, searching for some motivation and self discipline, or a whole new career direction in an attempt to make money doing something you love.  While the beginning of January may bring the same kind of feelings, know that the stars will soon align for you, and your future will be clearer than ever.  Lay the bong to rest this month.  Stick to an uplifting sativa in a hand pipe when you do choose to smoke, but you’ll want to keep yourself in tip top shape this month.

Your primary focus during January will remain with matters of the heart.  Whether you are dealing with an existing relationship, or the blossoming of a new one, the relationship will continue to gain strength.  Work together to find harmony as a couple.  This will be a major source of your happiness during January, but be careful:  Unjustified doubts of intentions or feelings of insecurity could be your downfall if you let it.  If you feel negative thoughts rolling in, take a walk, smoke a bowl, and think before you speak.

Gemini February 2016

Stoner Gemini, February will be an overall calm and harmonious time for you as the negative vibes of January will be neutralized by the planets.  The relationship that you’ve been nurturing for the past couple of months will continue to be at the top of your priorities, and family will be of extreme importance to you this month as well.  It is likely that towards the end of the month, there will be a family matter that requires your attention.

February is filling you with passion, and if you’re not careful, that passion could come out in areas where it’s not wanted.  The intensity of your relationship will be on the rise during February, but be mindful of the words you choose and how you choose to say them.  Your boldness could come off as offensive to your partner, and it could cause some unnecessary hiccups in your relationship.  If a situation does arise, it won’t be anything that can’t be quickly smoothed over with a make up smoke sesh.  Smoke about it, forget about it, right?

During the first half of February, you will feel enlightened and motivated.  Take advantage of this in all aspects of your life.  Use it to finally make a dent on that long overdue to do list at work, spend time each day meditating and balancing oneself, and find time for a mini getaway if you can.  Try to spend your time with family and close friends, and avoid large social gatherings if at all possible.  Stick with a nice Sativa, you don’t want to let any Indica induced couch-lock highs to get in the way of accomplishing your goals this month.

Gemini December 2015

Stoner Gemini, December will be happy toking.  The stars are definitely favoring your romantic relationships and leisurely activities this month, but your professional life won’t be a total bag of dirt weed either.  You are starting to recover from the backlash the last couple of months have put on your career, and you’re finally able to grab the reins and take back control.  

Stay task oriented in the workplace, and pay attention to detail.  A small oversight could cause bigger problems than you may have anticipated.  Avoid the head fog and stick to your vaporizer until after work when you can finally let loose.  While you may feel like you’re “back in the groove” again, you have a lot of lost time to make up for and it’s always better to be safe than sorry.

The stars are (still) heavily influencing your love life. Continue to enjoy it while it lasts!  You might be surprised at the level of romantic encounters you have this month, or the intense spark that an already existing relationship may receive.  Your mind may be craving fun or adventurous activities.  As long as you aren’t skipping out on any responsibilities, give in to this desire every chance you get.  If you can, grab some buds and get out of town for the weekend, check out a concert, or maybe you’ll want to plan a date night at a place you’ve never been to before.  Make the most of this positive life stage you are experiencing and know that each day is the stepping stone to a better tomorrow.

Gemini November 2015

Stoner Gemini, I can’t say that November will be an easy month for you; so you must be able to take the good in with the bad, and have faith that things will work themselves out.  Since the planets have shifted against you, you will be subject to an abnormal amount of negative energies, but only you can ultimately control how they affect you.

Stay focused on the present, trying to improve what you currently have rather than starting anew.  Your career might not be continually progressing at the rapid rate you had hoped, or maybe you feel that what you are doing today doesn’t seem to be helping you reach future goals, or maybe you feel like you just can’t get anything right:  This is only temporary and the only way to get through it is to keep puffin’ along.  Like I said, here and now.  Don’t try to overcompensate by biting off more than you can chew.  Stay professional, take any criticisms with grace, and know that in good time, everything will fall into place.  Work will be the main source of stress this month, so consider some office yoga or mid-day meditation to help keep yourself centered.  I would also recommend keeping a sneak a toke handy for emergencies.

Continue to focus on yourself this month.  Your overall health will become very important to you during November, and understandably so.  When other parts of your life become chaotic, it’s only natural that you would look for control within yourself.  Whether you are changing your diet, exercising more, or meditating with help of the sacred herb; let the positive changes flow and manifest from the inside out.  

Libra October 2015

Stoner Gemini, like the seasons, your life is in a transition period.  September’s awkwardness will be followed by October’s feelings of instability.  During this time you’ll be feeling a little aloof.  The cosmos will be draining most of your energy, leaving you in mental couch-lock.  Keep fighting the good fight, and you will be rewarded with enough sporadic bursts of energetic life forces to be able to cut through the haze and accomplish what needs to be done.  Now before you start to panic about things that haven’t even happened yet, stop, take a hit and relax.  Remember that life is what you make of it.  A positive outlook and humor will go a long way, so try not to take yourself too seriously.

Take this month to reflect on your current life situation, the things you’re grateful for and the things you wish to change.  Like I said, you are entering a transition period.  Your goals, views, and desires will begin to shift as well, and you might start feeling complacency towards your life’s current status.  Try not to get too hung up on any one thought; just explore them.  As the month progresses, everything will become clearer.

For your own sake, I would highly recommend that you steer clear of any and all medibles, and toke lightly during the “work” day.  You don’t need any added brain fog.  However, feel free to let loose in your personal time.  Not only will it help relieve any stress you might be feeling, but with all that extra mind wandering you’ll be doing this month, I can’t think of any better way to help expand the conscious mind.

Gemini September 2015

Stoner Gemini, brace yourself this month.  September brings on an awkward period for you.   Neither your professional career, nor your personal life will be flying high.  The planets positive and negative emanations will be blocked out by each other, neutralizing most of their support or bad influences.  You’re not winning,  you’re not losing, you’re really just staying afloat.  But hey, don’t you worry!  As Bob says:  “Every little thing is going to be alright”.  Normally a Sativa strain is your best bet, but a nice Indica hybrid might help you mellow and find some inner peace.  

Try not to overcompensate for your lack of “achievements” by over exerting yourself.  I know this may be a hard concept for your attention-driven, go-getter attitude to grasp; but, excelling should not be a top priority for you.  After so many consistent months of kicking ass at your job, I think you’ve earned a break from your T-break.  Now I am not suggesting that you sit in a foggy haze of stale smoke for the next month.  I’m just saying it wouldn’t kill you to “smoke two joints before you smoke two joints”, if you are picking up what I’m laying down.

The one thing that you are probably aware of by this point, is that your non-existent love life has finally received a little planetary support these last few months.  It’s exciting, and you will finally be sure of what direction you want things to go.  However, your words and actions are not coming across as clear as you think.  Be mindful to the way you portray your feelings or you might be as deceitful as that huge wake and dab you’re never sure why you thought was a good idea.  Every success you have remains entirely in your hands this month. Only you can light that bowl, but don’t get carried away, or you’ll roast the whole thing.

Gemini August 2015

Stoner Gemini, the month of August will prove to be quite an interesting time for you.  The general sphere of things is looking bright and favorable for you.  Although the potential for negative influences is always present, you will receive an undeniable amount of support.  This support may come from rather unusual sources, who in most circumstances would be the source of your demise.  It’s like a world where medibles give you super strength instead of force you to become one with the couch.  Sounds too good to be true, doesn’t it?

You have continued to put forth your best efforts into your career, and it shows.  The never ending workload will continue (surprise, right?).  Have no fear, you have more than enough life energy to accomplish the tasks ahead of you.  You’re only flaw is trying to do too much as once.  This might be a time for you to reevaluate the actual importance of all of the projects you have scattered about like ashes in the wind.  Put your goals in focus and knock them down, one hit at a time.  I recommend a sativa hybrid to keep motivation going without letting your ideas wander too far away.

Gemini, get excited!  For the first month in, oh I don’t know… EVER…  The goddess of love is looking out for you.  Don’t be surprised if you meet a few potential love interests.  It’s okay to play the field and have a good time, but you also need to know when to admit that some of them might just be new smoking buddies rather than your one and only.  Honesty is the best policy.  Don’t avoid the truth for fear that you might hurt someone else.  The longer you allow it to continue, the more damage you will do not only to them, but yourself.

Gemini July 2015

Stoner Gemini, July will bring you many successes, positive energies, and a heightened sense of creativity will surge through you.  The only potential drawback for you this month will come from your personal relationships, although, with your natural wit and charm it is nothing you can’t handle.  Just remember you can’t appreciate the good without the negative.  A good Sativa strain will be your trusty ally this month.  The sacred Sativa strain will keep your motivation and creative juices flowing!  It will also act as a mood booster to deflect any negative energies trying to bring you down.

You are a force to be reckoned with in the workplace,Gemini!  Your creativity and ambition will guide you to many new projects and opportunities.  Your successes will seem to come effortlessly.  You’ll be “feeling good, feeling alright” about yourself and the direction of your life, which will result in optimal productivity.

It will be difficult to deal with any negative outside influences that may arise, whether it be from your lover, family, or friends.  This is especially difficult when you feel like you’re on Cloud 9.  You might feel as though they are trying to rain on your parade, resulting in anger and defensiveness.  My advice?  Smoke about it, forget about it.  That does not mean to be disrespectful and ignore the situation all together.  Rather, realize that at this time it would be best to revisit this issue at a later date, instead of feeding into it.  Don’t let petty arguments distract you from your goals

Gemini June 2015

May is your month to shine, Stoner Gemini.  The Universe is on your side, and is providing you with an incredibly positive time in your life.  You will experience a great energy shift, and you will be able to apply this to all aspects of your life, remaining unburdened by any serious issues or obstacles.

Your career will definitely benefit from the surge of energy coursing through you.  Your positivity and go-get-it attitude will be the direct source of your increased productivity.  There will be many new and exciting opportunities that are presenting themselves to you, but don’t think that they will effortlessly come to fruition.  You cannot expect results without putting in the work.  If you are in a “higher” up position, pay special attention to your colleagues.  Someone may have a secret agenda that you should know about.  Still working hard to get to the top?  Put all this energy to good use.  Put you work in overdrive.  Your hard efforts will be noticed and rewarded by the end of the month, which could potentially land you a promotion of sorts.  Remember, the level of your success is entirely up to you.  You have the herb and the papers, but nobody is going to roll that joint for you.

On the love front, May will bring you some interesting news (FINALLY!!).  While at the time it may seem irrelevant to you but, have no doubt, it will directly influence your life down the road.  If you are in a relationship, be extra attentive to your lover and display your feelings towards them more vividly.  With your friends, assume a neutral position.  Right now is not the time for silly feuds.  This month you have the ability to resolve any issues that may arise.  Your positive energies will be contagious.  Use your influencing powers to help spread love and happiness to all those who come into contact with you.  Bond with old and new friends with the help of the sacred herb whenever possible.  Just do more sharing than smoking.  Now is not the time to get in a couch-lock, you have important work to do!